Little Kittie in the Big Citi

A Polyamorous Wedding

2011-11-24T11:31:00.000-05:00

People often ask me what kind of ceremony would be appropriate for two people who are both polyamorous. Here is the ceremony that Pinkdom, Clonetwin, and I wrote for our wedding. We stripped out all of that "forsaking all others" crap, but did manage to include a Bible verse. Feel free to modify, use, and enjoy as you see fit.

Celebrant

We are here to celebrate the joining of Citi Kittie and Pinkdom. Their marriage is a symbol of the continuation of community and the formation of their own community within the larger community of their friends and families.

Love is a friendship that has caught fire.
It is quiet understanding,
mutual confidence,
sharing and forgiving.
It is loyalty through good and bad.
It settles for less than perfection,
and makes allowances for human weakness.
Love is content with the present.
It hopes for the future and it doesn't brood over the past.
It's the day-in and day-out chronicle of irritations, problems, compromises,
small disappointments, big victories, and working toward common goals.

Reading from 1 Corinthians Chapter 13:4 -7

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels,
But have not love,
I am nothing more than a loud gong
Or a noisy cymbal.

And if I have the gift of prophecy,
And understand all mysteries,
And have all knowledge,
And a faith that can move mountains,
But have not love,
I am nothing.

Love is patient
Love is kind.
Love is never jealous, boastful, proud or rude.
Love is never selfish, resentful, or quick-tempered.
Love keeps no record of wrongs.

Love always protects.
Love always trusts.
Loves always hopes.
Love never gives up.

Love never fails.
And love never ends.

Faith, hope, and love
Abide in these three.
But the greatest of these
Is love.

Back to celebrant

Using the words of Kahlil Gilbran I charge you to:

Love one another, but make not a bond of love
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous but let each one of you be alone
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

I, Citi Kittie, take you as my partner, my constant friend, and my love, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, and to travel with you on your journey of discovery.

Here, in the presence of family and friends, I promise to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

I, Pinkdom, take you as my partner, my constant friend, and my love, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, and to travel with you on your journey of discovery.

Here, in the presence of family and friends, I promise to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

Exchange of the rings:

The circle has always been regarded as a symbol of eternity. Without beginning and without end it stands outside time. Your love also is eternal with no beginning or end. These rings are the reflection of their love and their respect for one another and reflects to others the vows they have already taken.

Citi Kittie says: Pinkdom with this ring, I pledge my love to you for all the days of my life.

Pinkdom says: Citi Kittie with this ring, I pledge my love to you for all the days of my life.

May your marriage bring you all the exquisite excitements a marriage should bring, and may life grant you also patience, tolerance, and understanding.

May you always need one another - not so much to fill your emptiness as to help you to know your fullness. A mountain needs a valley to be complete; the valley does not make the mountain less, but more; and the valley is more a valley because it has a mountain towering over it. So let it be with you and you.

May you need one another, but not out of weakness.
May you want one another, but not out of lack.
May you entice one another, but not compel one another.
May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another.
May you succeed in all important ways with one another, and not fail in the little graces.
May you look for things to praise, often say, "I love you!" and take no notice of small faults.

If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back.

May you enter into the mystery which is the awareness of one another's presence - no more physical than spiritual, warm and near when you are side by side, and warm and near when you are in separate rooms or even distant cities.
May you have happiness, and may you find it making one another happy.
May you have love, and may you find it loving one another!

You may kiss each other.

May I present to you, the married couple, Citi Kittie and Pinkdom.

Holiday Camming

2010-12-22T18:12:00.000-05:00

If you haven't been watching my cam, here is one of my holiday outfits you've been missing.

I've been very naughty this year.

A Birthday Present

2010-10-27T09:56:00.001-04:00

The Suggestion

Recently I went on a date with a married couple. Well, date might be an exaggeration. I was a birthday gift for the husband.

Being treated like a sex object is a fetish of mine. So I was intrigued when the wife messaged me about being a gift. And by intrigued I mean turned on.

This was not the first time I've been a present (I know, you are all shocked). But it was my first time with this couple, so I figured I should do it right. A couple weeks before the date my Miss and I had lunch with the wife to negotiate the scene. My Miss wanted to make sure I was safe and didn't agree to anything too crazy. Sometimes I get excited and need someone to rein me in.

The Negotiation

The lunch was odd; sitting in a restaurant discussing things like oral sex and getting peed on. I'm pretty sure the guy behind me heard a lot; no idea what he thought. Maybe it was his best lunch ever.

The wife told me what to wear and that I should give her hubby a birthday card that listed my boundaries. The idea was that I'd be a surprise present.
At work the day of the date I had a hard time focusing. I bought a card and my hands shook as I wrote out the message. It felt so dirty.

Before leaving I realized we hadn't discussed dinner. Which made sense. I wasn't invited for dinner and conversation. I was invited to be a sex toy. I ate a breakfast bar and drove over.

The Arrival

They both met me at the door and showed me into the living room. They gave me some water and had me look over the toys they planned to use on me. I have no allergies, like latex or glycerin, so I had no concerns. But I felt a bit intimidated looking at a table full of sex toys that would be used on me.

After a couple minutes of small talk she told me to strip. Right there in the living room. No dinner, no drinks, no tour of the house. Just strip. I was there to be used.

This threw me. At parties I sneak off to change into my girl clothes. And then I feel sexy and flirty. Being told to strip out of my work clothes and be sexy about it felt weird. And humiliating. Which made it hot.

I didn't do a very good strip show; they were boy clothes after all. But I tired to put on my girl clothes in a fun way. And as I got dressed I felt myself change. I became more relaxed, more flirty, and more comfortable with my role as a sex toy. I guess the clothes really do make the (wo)man.

Per her request, I was wearing black leather ankle boots with a 3 inch heel, lace thigh highs, a garter belt, black satin panties with bows, a red satin can-can skirt, a black and white striped satin corset, black lace gloves, and kitten ears. I also put on a kitten tail. Because I'm a kitty!

I meowed at them a few times; they seemed to like it.

Part of the idea behind me being a gift was the wife getting the husband to express his top side. (I was happy to be a practice sub; I'm easy.) So throughout the evening she would tell him what to do and then he'd tell me. After I finished getting dressed she told him to inspect me.
He ran his hands over me, checking my outfit. Then she told him to sniff me and tell her how I smelled. And once again I felt humiliated. And once again it was unexpected and exciting. I'd been driving in 100 degree heat for about an hour. Yes I had the A/C on, but still, I had no idea how I smelled or if he'd like it.

He sniffed the back of my head, the small of my back, my ass, my cock. He said he really liked how my cock smelled. Wow. I felt like a real piece of meat. Delicious!

She told him to blindfold me and then told me to undress him, with just one hand and my mouth. Being blindfolded really focuses your attention. I got his shirt off easily but struggled with his pants and boxers.

After he was undressed they pulled up my skirt, pulled down my panties, and vajazzled me. Or I guess pejazzled me. I was smooth all over, so it was easy for them. I couldn't see what they were putting on me. They kept teasing me about the different jewels and patterns. He said he was making an arrow that pointed to my girlcock. And then they were joking and laughing about how it looked on me. I had no say on what they were doing; I was just there to amuse them.

And Then The Oral Sex

With no warning she pushed me backward onto the sofa. That was a bit freaky as I didn't know there was a sofa there. Trust.

He straddled me and had me smell him. He rubbed his cock on my face and then his balls. He also shoved his fingers into my mouth and had me stick my tongue out and leave it out.

They both kept commenting on what a whore I was and how easy I was, showing up at a house where I barely know the people and letting them use me.

He had me lick and suck his balls while he put on a condom. She was down by my legs and started working my girlcock. As he slid his cock into my mouth she flicked my balls, slapped my girlcock, rubbed ice on my ass, tickled my feet. It was all I could do to stay under him.

He really liked my deep throating, even though it was a difficult angle. Eventually I had to safeword on the ball slapping as I'm not into CBT and it was quite painful. Some might say I have a low threshold for pain. I prefer to say I'm highly reactive; a little goes a long way.

This went on for quite some time, the wife working my cock and balls and hubby fucking my mouth and throat.

I didn't get hard, or even close, during all of her attention. I got hard from the humiliation when I changed in front of them. And when he sniffed me. But giving the blow job was pretty distracting. And my girlcock can be shy with new people. I didn't expect to get hard but forgot to mention it during negotiation. I hoped she wasn't insulted by my soft cock.

(Yes, I was sitting half-naked, with hubby fucking my mouth and the wife slapping and abusing my cock and balls and I was worried my lack of erection might hurt her feelings. That's just how my brain works.)
She used the situation as an opportunity to insult my girlcock. Calling it small, referring to is a clit, remarking how I couldn't get hard. This had all been negotiated, but it was still damn hot. I agreed, telling them how soft and little my girlcock was. Between gagging.

After a while hubby laid down and I got between his legs. She was spanking me and calling me names as I sucked him to orgasm. I felt a thrill as he throbbed in my mouth, knowing I'd been a good slut and gotten him off.

She asked if he wanted another but he said he was done, so they took off my blindfold and I laid back on the sofa and asked for a tissue. You know you gave a good blow job when you have to blow your nose!

And I needed some water. They also gave me some chocolate to eat and we made small talk for a few minutes. But it was clear it was time for me to go. They were done using me. Which, again, was really hot.

I put on my boy clothes, stuffed my girl clothes in a duffle, and headed out.

The Aftermath

Driving home I felt like a whore; used and sent on her way. It was such a wild, exhilarating feeling.

And my throat was sore for three days after that. A nice reminder, each time I swallowed.

Is it weird that I found that kind of date very easy? I didn't have to worry about small talk. I didn't have to think about what to do. I just had to do as I was told. Maybe it's a sign that I have intimacy issues.
Or maybe I'm just a slut.

This is a Test

2010-10-27T07:25:00.001-04:00

Hello world, how are you today?

Dysphoria to Euphoria: A Summer Camp Odyssey

2010-10-04T22:43:00.000-04:00

My Cunning Camp Plan

This year at Kinky Sex Camp I had a plan. Over the summer I'd been exploring my gender and a lot of issues had come. So at camp I wanted to try different gender presentations and see how they felt.

Camp is amazing because you can pretty much do anything you want (as long as it's consensual). And people are very accepting of whatever you do. Or they ignore you. Either way, it's a great place to experiment.

Facing My Issues

I really enjoy being sexual with my friends. That's one of the main reasons I'm polyamorous. And I really enjoy meeting someone new, flirting with them, feeling some chemistry, and then running off and getting naughty.

So you'd think I'd be in kitty heaven at play parties and conventions. However, there is another truth about me. The less I know someone, the less comfortable I am using my penis.

I always thought this was performance anxiety, or phobias about getting a disease. And while I think those are pieces of the puzzle, I now realize that gender dysphoria is a bigger part.

In the past I've dealt with this by trying to get to know people before I play with them. And explaining that I don't involve my penis much until I have more of a relationship going.

My friends have been fine with this. Everyone has boundaries and rules and limits. And there are plenty of fun, naughty things that don't involve my penis.

But it often leaves me frustrated because I want to connect in a more sexual way. Yet, when I do involve my penis it's left me feeling bad. It's sort of hard to describe. Being unable to describe it better than "feels bad" I just avoided it.

Then I got to camp and decided to face it.

Being a Girl at Camp

Thursday night I had a play date with a guy in the Sex O Rama. He wanted to fuck me in the ass and I thought that was a yummy idea.

He suggested we use a swing, which I'd never tried. So I laid on my back as he fingered me and then fucked me with his strapon. It was, indeed, yummy.

However, laying on my back in the swing, with him standing, meant I was staring down at my own body. Which meant I was staring at my own cock.

And that felt really weird, which was unexpected. Because, honestly, I see a lot of my cock. But I was dressed like a cute girl, getting fucked by a hot guy, and here I was, with a penis!

In the last couple of years I've done enough reading to know the name for this feeling, gender dysphoria. The feeling that my body's genital configuration wasn't matching up with the gender configuration that feels right in my brain.

Laying there in the swing, I didn't freak out. I mean, it's camp! Every couple of hours I expect to experience something that causes me to feel weird or strange or some other, unexpected emotion.

So after acknowledging my feelings, I stared at my partner, I stared at the ceiling, I closed my eyes. I took my focus off my cock (which was just lying there not doing anything) and focused on the strapon in my ass (which was doing quite a bit).

Later I asked him to take me outside, bend me over the railing, and fuck me. He was happy to oblige. And sure enough, I enjoyed that position much more because I couldn't see my cock. (The strangers walking by staring, or ignoring us, only added to the fun.)

After the fucking, we talked and I told him about my feelings. Being trans person himself he suggested it was dysphoria, which confirmed and affirmed my feelings.

Time to explore this further.

Being a Boy At Camp

Friday evening I presented as a boy. There were several events that seemed like good opportunities for this. One was cruising in the woods, which was specificily for male-identified people, or people presenting as male, or in male head-space.

My Mistress was presenting as a boy as well. So off we headed, into the woods. My Mistress with her strapon, me with my factory-issued cock.

It wasn't the best experience for us. I couldn't see anyone or much of what was going on because it was so dark. I have nothing against anonymous sex, but not seeing the person, or seeing what you are doing? I guess I'm a lot more visual than I thought.

And I was feeling pretty unsure about the whole presenting-as-a-boy thing. Which was unexpected, since I have a lot of experience presenting as a boy. But it made me feel off my game, or strange, or out of sorts.

And did I mention the part about not being able to see anyone? It wasn't working for my Mistress either, so we headed back to main camp to see what other trouble a couple of boys could get up to.

We made our way to the Times Square Cinema event. It was set up to approximate the grindhouses of Manhattan back when you went to watch porn, and grope each other.

I sat next to a dirty lady and we groped each other. And she fed me Junior Mints. Being that it was a dirty movie theater, I unzipped my pants. She commented that it was cute, and then molested me. I liked the comment, "cute", but also sensed it's not what most men would want to hear.

All in all, my night of being a boy resulted in not much play. I'm not sure being a boy is really for me.

I was ready to continue experimenting.

Making My Strapon My Own

My plan for Saturday was to present as a girl with a strapon. I was invited to a non-bio cock gang bang, a mythical creature orgy, and I'd be a "working" in the brothel as a whore (no actual money is involved).

Part of me wanted to involve my penis in some of the action, but this was research, for science! (or self-discovery), so I tucked my penis away in my panties (pointing it backward between my legs, giving me a smooth profile).

I had to cancel on the gang bang because my Mistress had a migraine and needed me to help her. But by the evening she was feeling better so I headed to the orgy, harness on and strapon ready. Using my strapon felt, amazing. I had people sucking on it and then fucked a girl. I could feel her opening on my shaft, could feel her wetness dripping on me, could feel her squeezing on it as I fucked her.

And I could feel pleasure from it that had nothing to do with my penis. (She was tucked away and soft the whole time.) Call it my psychic cock, my astral cock, energy orgasms, whatever, it was amazing. Like a girl, I was riding the orgasm wave up and down as it flowed from her pussy down my strapon and into my body.

I left the orgy feeling energized and excited, and wanting to fuck everyone with my strapon.

At the brothel I laid out two dildos on the bed, like a merchant showing her wares. I had no idea what people would think, but the reaction was great. During my two-hour shift I fucked two women, one a friend, the other a stranger.

And it felt great!

And I felt great about myself!

No "bad" feelings. No dysphoria, just wild elation. And more orgasms.

The experience of being a girl with a strapon left me feeling liberated, energized, euphoric. It was like suddenly, after years of misfires, everything clicked into place and instead of stumbling in the dark I was flying.

After Camp

I feel like I've had a major break through and I'm further along the road of self discovery, which is great. But it's also a bit scary because I don't where my journey may be going.

For years I've been fine with identifying as GenderQueer, but I"m feeling a lot more transgendered, transgirl, than I did before. And I'm not sure what to do with that.

The journey continues.

My Second Time as a Girl

2010-08-26T22:15:00.003-04:00

Second Verse Same as the First-What to Wear

I had another date and presented as a girl. This time it was with a girl who was presenting as a girl.

In telling people about it, everyone asked what I’d wear. I found it a bit annoying. As if that was the defining characteristic of being a girl. And it wasn’t a fetish event; it was just a date. But somehow saying, “jeans and a T shirt” didn't feel like the right answer. I was going out to present as a girl! Do girls go out wearing just jeans and a T shirt?

Apparently not, based on the suggestions I received. OK, so many of the suggestions were from men on the site where I cam. I can’t really count those. Except that those men represent a certain heteronormative expectation of what a girl should be. (Or they are just a bunch of freaks.)

For example, one guy asked if I’d be wearing pantyhose. The date was on August 20, in Washington DC. It was 101 degrees in the shade. I don’t think any woman in the District was wearing pantyhose that day. So no, I would not be wearing pantyhose.

I bought a new pink tank top that was mesh in the back, in a floral pattern. With a new pink bra with white polka dots. And jeans.

Jeans? Really? On a day when you could smoke fish on the side walk? So I went through my skirts. Many of them aren’t street legal; they don’t cover my butt.

But before the date I started noticing skirt lengths a lot more. Women’s skirts are really short. Like, really short. Good lord. So I went back through my skirts and decided that many of them were acceptable.

But still I resisted the idea. As if wearing a skirt was the final step in presenting as a girl, but wearing jeans meant I could still claim a bit of my boyness. As if I might be pulled over by the gender police and I needed plausible denialability. “Officer, what do you mean I’m trying to present as a girl? I’m wearing jeans!”

Which I realized was ridiculous. If I was presenting as a girl, I was crossing that line whether I was wearing jeans or a skirt.

In the end I was just like everyone else. What would I wear? How short would my skirt be? How revealing my top? Apparently that’s what defines a girl; how much of her body she reveals.

I wore a skirt. Black, just about an inch above the knee. And pink high tops. (And no pantyhose.)

I wore make up, this time with eye shadow and some better concealer. I felt a bit better about my appearance. Did I pass “better”? I don’t know. I felt a bit better about it.

Stepping Back Outside

Once again I was terrified the moment I stepped outside. Like I’d entered an alien landscape and had to get to my car as fast as possible. But as soon as I was out of my neighborhood I relaxed.

A friend told me that most people don’t really care what other people wear; most people just want to be left alone. And another said that most people only notice things right in their face.

And sure enough, on the drive over no one even looked at me. I hit several stop lights as the lead car, with large numbers of people crossing the street. (Summer in DC brings lots of tourists.) But none of them even looked at my car. They were all consumed with their own lives.

I parked at my date’s house and stepped out of the car. No one on the street noticed me. It was completely uneventful. My date and I sat in her kitchen catching up. When one of her roommates came home my date leaned in and asked how I wanted to be introduced.

Yikes. I gave her my girl name and that was that. Her roommate smiled and said hi to me as a girl.

It felt really nice to meet someone as a girl. Or have them meet me as a girl. Like they were seeing the real me. Or a more authentic version of me. Or my presentation was more authentic.

When I meet people, especially girls, I spend a lot of time and energy to let them know I’m not like other guys. I have always felt it very important to get that across. It was nice to let my presentation speak for itself this one time.

And when I’ve spent time with guys, especially extremely heteronormative guys, it always makes me uncomfortable. Because it seems like there is always a moment when they look around the room and realize there are only “guys” in the room, so they can suddenly start saying their “guy bullshit” or start acting all “guy”. And it’s OK because everyone there is in on it, because we are all “guys”.

And I’m never sure exactly how to respond. I’d prefer them to know that I’m not one of them. Often, I’d prefer to just leave.

Getting Undressed

Anyway, that was about it for my girlness that day. We went up to her room and had sexynaughtyfuntimes. Which was wonderful. My wig didn’t last very long and my make up came off fairly quickly.

I didn’t feel like I had switched back to a boy. I just felt like I wasn’t wearing a wig or make up anymore.

After that we went out to dinner. I wore girl jeans and a boy T shirt. Was I a boy again? Was I still a girl?

I’ve heard some trans people say they have a male persona and a female persona. I’ve always maintained that I’m just me. But the last couple weeks I’ve been feeling more split. Like maybe I do have a male persona and a female persona and I want to be that female persona more. Not that I want to present as a girl more, but I want to inhabit that persona more.

Which smacked up against my older conception of myself. Was I changing? Was I wrong and now right? Or was something else going on?

Something Else May Be Going On

As I thought about it more I kept going back to meeting the roommate and her seeing me as a girl (or a transgirl at least). And it wasn’t that I was a different person (or persona) than if I had been wearing jeans and a T shirt. It was that she was seeing me as a different person.

People treat men and women differently. We have a different set of expectations, assumptions, preconceived notions. We even have different titles and colors.We all know that a man can say something and it means one thing and when a woman can say the same thing it can mean something different. We are all aware of these double standards.

So when I present as a girl, the set of assumptions people bring to me are different. And I have to react to them and play off them in a different manner than I would if I were presenting as a boy.

So it’s not that my personality is different when I present as a girl, it’s that I have to adjust my behavior as well as what I say and how I say it to effectively communicate my meaning.

I make it sound like I was off giving speeches as a girl. I think all I said to her was, “yes,” and maybe, “uh huh,” and possibly, “oh.”

But I was aware of those differences, that set of assumptions, and maybe feeling a bit paralyzed by them. But they feel like a better set of assumptions than the set of assumptions used for guys.

I’m still not sure I was meant to be a girl. Or want to present as one more often. Maybe I want to be something more in-between. The main thing is, I want to be me. And I’ve always found that a challenge in our society. But I don’t plan on moving, so I guess I need to figure this out.

My First Time as a Girl

2010-08-12T10:54:00.002-04:00

My First Date

I started dating when I was 13. But I’ve always presented as a boy. The other night I went on a date and presented as a girl.

The plan was to meet at her house, change, and then go to a restaurant. She’d be presenting as a boy.

It’d been planned for weeks, and the closer it got the more nervous I became. Several times I thought of canceling, but I pushed myself to go through with it.

I was especially nervous about my razor stubble showing. I’d bought some concealer and decided to try it out before I left my house. It took a while, but I was able to blend it in so it looked pretty natural. It covered most of the evidence that I could grow a beard, but above my upper lip betrayed “the truth” about what was between my legs.

After that, I tried on my outfit and showed off to my Mistress and my Miss. I wanted to drive over as a boy, but my partners convinced me to go over as a girl. Wow. I hadn’t planned on that. Alone, in the car, as a girl. But it made sense. So that’s what I did.

What I Wore

I have lots of slutty, fetish clothes. But “normal” girl clothes, not so much. And it was a casual date, I didn’t want to overdress. So I wore a fuchsia tank top, a pink bra (you could see the straps because it didn’t follow the contours of the tank), tight girl jeans, and pink Chuck high tops.

I also wore a light brown wig (thank you again Fetlife.com; I won the wig in their Christmas giveaway), dangly earrings, and a couple rings.

Before I left my Mistress and Miss gave me some advice. I felt like I was 13 and going on my first date all over again. They couched me on my voice (voice training in 5 minutes?) and I practiced a bit. My Mistress said, “Just don’t say much. It’s easy to be a girl; don’t talk and smile a lot.”

Then my Miss said, “Remember, even if he buys you dinner, it’s your body, you get to decide what happens to it.” I joked, “Not on this date; I think I have to put out.”

All advice received, I psyched myself up and . . . panicked several times before I made it out the front door. There was a neighbor sitting in her car in her driveway. Just, sitting there. What was she doing? Why didn’t she just drive off? Finally, she did, and I took a deep breath and went outside for the first time as a girl.

Driving Over as a Girl

I drove through Washington DC during rush hour, so, a lot of traffic. I stared straight ahead and tried to focus on driving. And of course there was cop right behind me. I had visions of being pulled over and having to talk to the cop. Or having to change a tire in my wig and makeup. Or hitting a car in front of me and having to exchange insurance information.

The reality was a lot more boring. Just a lot of stop and go traffic. Lots of construction. Lots of merging.

But even with all the merging the drive was fairly easy. I seemed to luck out several times; people kept letting me into their lane. Usually I have to fight my way into a merge and I get cut off a lot.

The third time it happened it struck me. The other drivers were seeing me as a girl and being nice to me. From the distance of one car to another I was passing just fine (I dubbed it “car passing”).

I’d anticipated a lot of reactions; violence, mumbled insults, jeers, people (waitresses, cashiers) ignoring me. People being extra nice was not a reaction I had considered.

What She Wore

She dressed in a casual shirt and jeans. She had a buzz cut and used makeup to draw in a mustache and beard line under her chin.We were quite a sight, I’m sure. (Yes there are pictures. No, you can’t see them.)

She, being the boy for the night, drove us to the restaurant. I felt a lot more relaxed being in the car with someone. We chatted about the usual first date stuff; her job, my family, TV shows we liked, shark week. I realized I was doing it; I was living like it was shark week!

She’d picked a restaurant she’d never been to. It was an Italian place just off the highway. Walking up to the door she asked if we should have a cover story, like that we were actors. I thought, now you ask this? I couldn’t really think straight; I just wanted to get inside so I simply smiled.

As we made our way through the parking lot I was worrying about my walk. Was I walking like a boy? Did I need to walk more like a girl? What did that even mean? If I was doing this to be like the real me, should I really be worrying about my mannerisms? Shouldn't I just be me? These questions that are still on my mind.

Dining as a Girl

The smokers outside the bar stared and then looked away. We went in the entrance for the restaurant and stopped just inside the door. It was as if we hadn’t thought about what to do after we got inside. It really was like being 13 all over again and not knowing how to get the hostess’ attention. Finally I suggested we go up to the hostess station.

The hostess didn’t even blink, just smiled and sat us. I sat with my back to the wall; I wanted to to see anything that might be coming at me. Of course, that meant everyone could see my face. I knew my body was passing just fine, it’s my face I was worried about.

The waitress smiled and made some bad jokes. I sensed she had a little banter she'd relied on for years. After she took our drink order I had a chance to size up our fellow diners. How shall I put this? They all looked like they’d had some hard living. And probably had a lot more hard living ahead of them.

And then a family (?) came in. It was five women, so I guessed a mom and her kids. They ranged in age from very young to mid-teens, and then the mom. One of the girls had bangs that stuck straight out and were dyed bright pink. She wore a sleeveless hoodie and bandeau top, with jeans that barely covered her crotch.

Another girl wore a belly shirt, her rather large belly hanging down over her pants. She had blue hair. I thought wow, we picked the right place! We fit right in.

The girl with the pink hair kept staring at me. I thought she was trying to tell if I was a boy. Later, my Mistress said it was probably because I was wearing a wig. “And you have to remember,” she said, “pretty girls get stared at.”

I didn’t do any staring. I just focused on my meal. And kept smiling. The rest of the meal was uneventful. We ate, chatted, got the check, and left. Just like a normal date.

After dinner we went back to her place and I sucked her strap on and she fucked my ass while her boyfriend sat in the next room working on his computer. Just like a normal first date, right?

Later, as we basked in the afterglow of my ass-fucking, my date mentioned she identifies as a gay male. Suddenly I had an overwhelming desire to be her gay boyfriend. I suggested we go out again with her presenting as male and me presenting as her twink boyfriend.

Driving Home as a Boy

I stuffed my wig and bra in my purse for the drive home. I’m sure my makeup was gone by then too. Ahem.

I realized I’d felt more like a girl in the beginning of the evening, but by the end I felt more like a gay boy. I think I was reacting to her male energy. Or maybe it was being naked and getting fucked in the ass. Hard to say.

At the same time, I was really wishing I had a vagina for her to fuck as well. I wish I could have rolled over and had her slide her strapon into my wet pussy. I wanted to stuff my panties into my purse on the way home because they were too wet from my excitement. I wanted to feel the lube sliding done my things.

And with a factory-issued vagina I wouldn’t have to worry about passing as a girl. I’d just “be” a girl.

Or is it really that easy, even for people assigned girl at birth?

I know I wasn’t really happy with how I looked. I wanted to pass better; to have no trace of my maleness showing. I have a big nose and angular face, but there are ways makeup can deal with that.

For years I’ve fantasized about being a woman and it was usually some cute girl I’d seen, or some movie star I wanted to be. This was about being the girl I am; not some idealized version of a girl I’ll never be.

And there are girls with big noses, and angular faces, and even Adam’s apples that stick out a bit “too” much. And girls with mustaches. Presenting in a conventionally cute and sexy way can be a challenge for many girls.

Waking Up as a (?)

Going out as a girl was a huge high. It was amazing and scary and I told myself I’d never do it again. But by the next afternoon I wanted to go back out as a girl. I wanted everyone to see me that way.

My Mistress and I went shopping and I was excited to get some normal (not fetish) girl clothes so I could go out more often. But at the store I felt overwhelmed by the endless racks and wanted to hide again. It seemed like all the women in the store knew what they were doing except me.

After a while my Mistress helped me go through a rack of shirts, rejecting every single one as inappropriate, ugly, wrong for my body type, etc. And then I thought of my Miss, who hates shopping for clothes because it can be so impossible for a girl to find things that look good and fit right.

And I realized, maybe I’m a lot closer to being a girl than I realized.

Throat Fucking

2010-06-13T17:23:00.000-04:00

I seem to be getting dirtier and dirtier. I recently realized I really like sex when it gets messy. Very messy. Like, the kind of messy you get from throat fucking.

A couple weeks back I was at a play party, for the first time in months. Unfortunately, there wasn't much play going on.

It was a going away party for one of the honorary members of our triad. He's moving out to the west coast in a couple weeks. He was a real integral member of the local BDSM community. He will be sorely missed.

He rented a BDSM club for the party so we had the run of the place. The first time I'd been there was a year earlier when he rented it for his birthday. At that party he had had several party games, one of which was a contest to see who could deep throat the deepest.

I love taking things deep in my throat, and kind of get off on the gag reflex. So I thought I'd be a contender. But he used a night club and really, that's way to fat for me, and most of us.

I lost to a girl who could take over 10 inches. Which is quite impressive.

Later, another girl was using a dildo on her own throat, to see how deep she could take it. She was using a double-ended dildo and asked if I wanted to try it. Of course I said yes. She started fucking my face with the dildo. First just to the back of my mouth, but then deeper. I started gagging a lot, and shaking all over from it. Pretty soon I had to time my breathing to her thrusts.

We were sitting on a spanking bench in the middle of the club and soon everyone was watching. I didn't notice because I was staring at the ceiling, my mouth wide open, her dildo deep in me. She was calling me names and telling me to take it even deeper for her. I was gagging and groaning and begging for more.

Each time she pulled the dildo out more of my own spit dripped on my chin. After a while spit was dripping off me. She scooped it up and slapped my face with it, rubbing it on my cheeks. She called me a dirty girl as she rubbed it on my neck. I was still shaking and trembling, not quite believing what was happening. I knew I liked to gag, but I'd never produced so much spit, never shaken so much, never wanted so much more.

Once more she plunged the dildo down my throat and once more I gagged and choked. Then I felt a bit of my stomach come up. Wow. That was really disgusting and dirty and kind of hot. When she pulled the dildo out again I whispered, "I want to puke for you." Her eyes lit up and she rammed her hand to the back of my throat.

Her fingers rubbed around at the base of my tongue. I was jerking and straining, gagging very time her fingers moved in me. The feeling was overwhelming; it was all I could think of, all I was aware of. The world was her fingers and my throat.

Though a part of me was thinking, "Am I really doing this? Am I really opening my mouth in a room full of people so a girl can push her fingers into my throat? Am I really begging to puke for her? What does that even mean, to puke 'for her'? Is that something she wants me to beg for? And why would I even want such a thing? How disgusting am I?"

She kept this up for a while, but I never came close to puking again. I guess I'm just too good at gagging.

Eventually she stopped and I noticed all the people, sitting in a circle around us. Humiliating and hot! We went into the bathroom to clean up, where she told me how much she enjoyed it, but she wouldn't kiss me because my face was so messy and dirty.

I still find it kind of disgusting and disturbing, but I'm also watching a lot of spitting videos now. It's too much of a turn on to avoid.

Online Slavery Article

2010-01-17T10:16:00.001-05:00

Eden Fantasys just posted another article of mine. This one is about my experiences as an online slave.

"I ended up the collared pet of a woman I never met, never talked to on the phone, saw on webcam only a handful of times, but communicated with almost daily. It’s not easy turning your life over to another person, and maybe not all that healthy. But its allure was as strong as any drug and I just couldn’t resist."

Read the rest here:

http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexis/sex/online-bdsm-0113101/

Butchy Answers: Dear Pruddie

2009-12-16T07:42:00.003-05:00

Dear Pruddie, Thirty-five years ago I was traveling in Europe with a fellow college student (who I really did not know that well). About two weeks before we came home (it was a six-week trip)—he asked me one night (on a city street) if I was gay—and I said "probably." He then slugged me (broke a tooth), walked off, and I never spoke to him again.

He has recently connected with me via Facebook - and is quite openly gay and has a long-time lover. (I am currently involved in my own relationship with a woman.) He and his companion are coming to NYC and want to get together for drinks/dinner.

That is fine (I do not hold grudges)—but there is a small elephant in the room. I cannot envision me sitting across from him and his friend all evening and saying absolutely nothing. Should I bring it up ahead of time or wait until sometime we are together? He has made absolutely no mention of the incident so far.

-New York

Dear New York,

You need so much help that it boggles Butchy's mind, and Butchy's mind is huge and not easily boggled. The best way Butchy can help is by telling you everything that you are doing wrong. (Butchy assumes this is the same approach your parents used when trying to raise you.)

First, you make far too many parenthetic comments. One or two is fine. More indicates a lack of decisiveness that your enemies will see as a sign of weakness, and rightly so.

Second of all, always hold grudges. Grudges are meant to be held, that's why they're called grudges.

Thirdly, the elephant in the room is not small. The jerk punched you in the face and caused permanent damage. That's huge. In fact, it's elephant size. That's why they're called elephants.

Fourth, you went to Europe.

Next, you chose a traveling partner you didn't know well. This wasn't a weekend bender in Vegas, where going with a homophobe with anger issues is actually a plus. You went to another continent for six weeks. You can't choose your traveling companions the same way you choose your sex partners: with reckless abandon. You need to be careful.

Sixthly, you chose to come out to him on a city street in the middle of the trip with, Butchy is guessing, no idea how he'd react. Either that, or you're an awful judge of how people will react.

In addition, you joined Facebook.

And eighthly, you accepted his friends request.

After 35 years of bad choices, that you admit to, it is difficult to know where to be begin. But make no mistake, Butchy does not blame the victim. This jerk is a jerk and needs to be dealt with.

You need to view this piece of information as a bomb. Ideally, at dinner you'll soften him up with a barrage of small insults and digs. Just when his partner is about to protest or defend him, you'll hit them both with this A-bomb of information. But this kind of attack is probably too advanced for you.

So instead, Butchy suggests you friend the jerk's lover on Facebook and message the lover with the story. Tell the lover you can't get together when they visit because the incident has given you PTSD. No good can possibly come from you telling the jerk's lover this story, which is why it is such a good way to get revenge. At most it will detonate a rift between them that will eventually break them apart. At the very least the jerk's lover will have to find a way to forgive the jerk.

And then unfriend the jerk and never communicate with him again. And continue to hold your grudge.

Enjoy,

Butchy

Pimpage

2009-12-13T11:22:00.003-05:00

Yes, this is shameless pimpage. But this kitty is not above such low tactics, especially if I win any of this stuff. And then I'll have a party and invite you to use it. Or me. Or both : )

Fetlife is giving away lots of toys this holiday. Just sit on Santa's lap and tell him what you want. http://fetlife.com/sit_on_santas_lap

Butchy's Thanksgiving Wish

2009-11-28T23:28:00.002-05:00

Every year Butchy reflects on what he is thankful for. He does this on a day he likes to call the Day for Giving Thanks. He hopes that, if he keeps doing this every year, it will eventually catch on.

This year Butchy is thankful most of all for submissives. Without submissives giving themselves to Butchy, where would Butchy be? Subless, that's where. Which is not a great place to be.

Next Butchy is thankful for dominants. Even though there are no dominants as dominant as Butchy, Butchy is still thankful they exist because Butchy can't be there for all the submissives in the world. As great as Butchy is, he does have limits of time and space.

Butchy is also thankful for his mom, for giving birth to him so many years ago. And then feeding him and keeping him safe and dry until he could assume his rightful place dominating her and the rest of his family. As the saying goes, from tiny acorns, great oak trees do go. As hard as it is be to believe, Butchy was once a tiny acorn in his mother's womb.

And finally, Butchy is not grateful to you, his readers. Read or don't read, it is all the same to Butchy. With the Internets he doesn't need to have an audience to continue. Unlike that time he was a radio host and things like "ratings" mattered. Now Butchy can enjoy the pure experience of expressing his truth, without having to be beholden to his readers.

Butchy is beholden to no one, thank you very much.

Note: Oh my. Um, well, the holidays can sometimes put Butchy in a bit of a mood. But all of us here at Little Kitty in the Big City are very thankful for all of our readers. Even if we don't have any.

- Citi Kittie

They Still Kill Trans People, Don't They

2009-11-20T00:04:00.002-05:00

Today is the Transgender Day of Remembrance. A day set aside to memorialize those who were killed due to anti-transgender hatred or prejudice. It's sad that we have to have a day like this each year but we do.

Because they still kill trans people.

In my blog, and in my life, I try to celebrate gender variance. I love going on cam dressed up cute, in whatever gender presentation strikes my fancy that day. But I never show my face.

Because they still kill trans people.

I love going out to parties and conventions where I feel free, and safe, to present in any way I choose. I love flirting and chatting. People tell me I even have a different walk when I'm at an event. Which surprises me because I don't try to walk any different. At an event, the way I present just feels so "right." But before I leave I always change back into my "street" clothes.

Because they still kill trans people.

I'm beginning to realize I'd be a lot happier if I could present to the world who I really am. I'm sure I'd have a lot less anxiety and depression if I could dress as my actual gender. I'd feel so much more authentic and real if people saw me as my true gender (the gender I was born with, even if people thought I was a different gender). It's who I really am. But I don't dare show them.

Because they still kill trans people.

Don't worry, I have plenty of happy, flirty, sexy posts still to come. But once a year we all need to stop. And remember.

Because they still kill trans people.

There are many events around the country, and around the world. I hope you'll attend one. [http://www.transgenderdor.org/]

Butchy McTopperson Answers: Ms Mannerrs

2009-11-12T09:51:00.005-05:00

Butchy is back with more advice, this time answering letters to Ms Mannerrs. I'd like to remind you that Butchy's advice is for entertainment purposes only. We accept no responsibility for anyone who actually tries his advice.

Also, per new FTC rules, we have not received any money, or any permission, for giving out this advice. Luckily, we have yet to receive any lawsuits either.

-- Citi Kittie

Dear Ms Mannerrs,

I have discovered that I have fallen into the habit of over-apologizing. I seek always to be polite and to keep my social interactions pleasant and smooth, but I have become quick to drop an "I'm sorry" for things that are clearly not my fault or have not inconvenienced anyone. For example, someone stepping on my foot or dropping my own handbag several feet away from any passersby.

I have been trying to substitute "Excuse me" as much as possible, but could you please suggest other things I may say to minimize my apologies? I am beginning to feel that the sheer excess is starting to diminish my sincerity, and that would make me truly . . . sorry.

Dear Sorry,

There are two kinds of people in the world: dominants and submissives. You, my dear Sorry, are a submissive. You'll never give up saying you're sorry because you truly are sorry. And even Butchy can't change your soul (the best he can do it crush it). While Butchy appreciates all submissives, you can't go around subbing to everyone indiscriminately, it's unseemly. And not everyone deserves to be subbed to; dominance has to be earned, just like respect or addressing someone by their first name.

It's also obvious you are not getting your submissive needs met from your current love-partner. In addition to saying sorry all the time, you are probably sexually unfulfilled. You need to find a love-partner who will dominate you in the manner you so desperately need. This will also give you more fulfilling orgasms.

A good dominant will get you apologizing all the time, for everything from your poor cooking skills to clumsy love-making abilities to your very existence. Once this begins to happen you'll be much less likely to apologize to random people who don't appreciate your inner lacking.

Enjoy,

Butchy

Dear Ms Mannerrs,

My problem is with dear friends of ours. The husbands know each other since before kindergarten, and the four of us have been close for years.

This couple is basically middle class. However, they spend like they're very wealthy (fancy car, expensive home improvements, extravagant vacations). Yet she is always complaining they have no money for these things, but "you get what you pay for" is their mantra.

My husband and I have always had houses, cars and vacations but are more frugal. Why am I so jealous? Help!

Dear Help,

You're jealous because your friends have nicer stuff than you. You'd like to have really nice stuff but you're careful with your money. This is better for you in the long run, but it means you have to suffer while your friends get to play. Butchy learned this lesson when his mom told him the story of the ant and the grasshopper.

In Aesop's tale the ants spend the summer collecting nuts (or whatever ants eat) while the grasshoppers go to circuit parties. (You'll probably need to Google that, Butchy is guessing you don't get out much.) When winter comes the ants have plenty to eat and the grasshoppers starve to death. Butchy appreciates the way the ants are able to triumph over the grasshoppers and watch them slowly die. However, we both know that your friends will just keep borrowing more money. When they declare bankruptcy the government will bail them out with welfare checks or massive tax cuts (depending on who wins the next election). So you can't rely on time and the government to destroy them.

Instead, keep up your frugal ways but use your friends' stuff. Properly dominating them will allow you to enjoy all their creature comforts with none of the bills. People this materialistic are usually insecure, so start by subtly implying their stuff isn't nice enough. They'll want to prove it is and let you use it.

Also, consider driving a wedge between them. If they are constantly bickering they'll enjoy spending time with you and your husband more than with each other. This could get them to take you on their fabulous vacations.

Enjoy,

Butchy

Butchy McTopperson Answers: Dear Abbey

2009-11-05T22:19:00.005-05:00

Please join me in welcoming our newest contributor, Butchy McTopperson. Butchy has been a dominant all his life. He started in the womb, manipulating his mom's diet via morning sickness. He has agreed to share his wisdom with all of you.

Since no one actually writes us letters, Butchy will be answering letters to other advice columnists. In this post Butchy answers letters to Dear Abbey.

-- Citi Kittie

Dear Abbey,

I have strong feelings about the word love. I use it only when I truly mean it. My husband's family, however, bandies it about as a common word.

How does one respond when someone says "I love you" when you know he or she doesn't mean it and is only saying it as a pleasantry? I hate saying it back to someone I don't really love. I feel the phrase should be reserved only when you are saying it from the heart. Any advice on what I should say, if anything at all?

-- Keeping Mum in Mississippi

Dear Mum,

As a dominant, your primary question is never, "What should I say?" but, "How do I best dominate my inlaws?"

Your narrow usage of love is by no means universal; Webster's has many definitions (I'm guessing, I didn't actually look it up because no mere dictionary can tell Butchy what a word means). However, that does not mean that you should let your pushy husband's family try and dictate how you use language.

If you don't love your inlaws, tell them. Just don't be a bitch about it. Let them know in a kind and sensitive manner that you lack any feelings of affection or emotional attachment for them. If they love your husband, and your letter indicates they do (and everyone else), they will want to win your affection. This will put you in a very powerful position.

Once they start trying to win you over it will be very easy for you to manipulate and dominate them.

Enjoy,

Butchy

Dear Abbey,

After our father's death last year, my brother, "Rex," and I moved in with our mother to help her out emotionally and financially. Rex and I have always respected each other's privacy and have always supported each other.

Rex has put a lock on his door, which makes Mom and me feel as if he doesn't trust us enough to respect his privacy. We have never invaded his space or given him cause not to trust us. He is a caring, considerate person, financially stable, socially active, and helps Mom out with any repairs needed around the house. I love him dearly, but I am puzzled that he feels he needs to lock his room as if we are not trustworthy.

My feelings are hurt. Our family has never had trust issues before. What do you think of his behavior, and am I being overly sensitive?

-- Open-Door Sis in Mississippi

Dear Door,

You claim to respect your brother's privacy but your question indicates that you do not. Your brother's locked door is a very firm boundary and it bothers you. Also, by referring to him with a name commonly associated with a dog it is clear you see him as sub-human. These are all very good signs in a budding dominant.

If you hope to truly dominate him, you need to get that lock off his door.

Use your mom as an ally in your efforts. Continue your late-night gossiping about how your brother doesn't trust or respect either of you. You don't need to tell your mom what to do with this information; she will find her own way to let her displeasure be known. Moms are experts at this. Eventually he'll remove the lock to please his mom.

It is obvious that your brother has locked his door so he can look at porn and jerk off. Once the lock comes off his insecurity about jerking off will increase. He may jerk off less or do it more furtively or later at night. Make sure to walk in on him at all hours, making it even harder for him to know when it's safe to get off. This will stress him out and unbalance him, making it easier for you and your mom to manipulate and dominate him.

Enjoy,

Butchy

New Article on Polyamory

2009-11-01T22:11:00.002-05:00

A new article by your friendly kitty is up at EdenFantasys.com. It's called the
The Practicality of Polyamory and it's all about my experiences trying to explain my relationships to people.

http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexis/sexual-health/coming-out-poly-100792/

I hope you enjoy it.

No Apologies

2009-10-13T22:03:00.000-04:00

In the summer of 1999 I seemingly had it all. I'd spent the previous 13 years playing by society's rules and was reaping its rewards. I was in a monogamous relationship. I was heteronormative and when my wife and I had sex it was bland, vanilla sex. I'd spent most of our relationship being a good husband, following her around the country for her career, and doing whatever I could to keep our relationships together. In fact, my wife and I had just put a down payment on a house in the suburbs, that's how mainstream I was.

Unfortunately, we were both miserable.

Years of trying to be someone I wasn't had taken its toll. I hated being straight and never flirting with anyone. I hated being traditionally male. I hated my job and I hated where I lived. And my wife was depressed, had anger issues, and fibromyalgia.

So ten years ago I quit my job, got divorced, and moved back to the East Coast. And started working on building a new life. A life where I present as the gender I was born to be and have the types of relationships that are right for me.

It's been a lot of hard work and I've had several missteps. I've learned a lot about ethical non-monogamy and the kinds of rules you need to have to stay healthy emotionally and physically. But they aren't the same rules that society told me to have.

Last month I moved in with my wife and our girlfriend. I also have a boyfriend and several play partners. And my partners have other partners. I no longer present as traditionally male, and often present as fairly femme. When I have sex it's the naughty, dirty, kinky kind that gets my partners and I off.

Many people tell me that all of this is doomed to fail. That this type of lifestyle, these kinds of relationships, this kind of gender presentation doesn't work out. That I'll end up alone and unloved.

Well you know what, I've tried it society's way and it didn't work out so well. There are no guarantees in this life. But at least this way, if I fail I'll know I failed on my own terms.

Now, I'm not hurting anyone. I'm not lying to anyone. I'm not manipulating anyone into doing things they don't want to do. I'm not breaking any laws. I'm treating everyone ethically and morally.

However, I may be making a few people uncomfortable by living my life the way I want. But for that have no apologies.

Citi Kittie is Currently on Summer Vacation

2009-08-19T09:29:00.003-04:00

There will be no updates for a while yet. The vanilla world has swelled up and crushed this little kitty. Family vacation, looking for a new place to live, moving, living with in-laws, moving into a new place, and now getting ready for my Miss to join my Mistress and I so we can all live together.

But this Kitty will return this fall.

I'll be living with both my Mistress and my Miss, so I'm sure there will be lots to update you on.

And we are all headed to Dark Odyssey Summer Camp, where this kitty will get up to no good, I'm sure.

I hope you're all having a great summer. See you this fall!

New Threesome Position

2009-04-15T08:07:00.002-04:00

This kitty loves threesomes. I think it's the optimum number for sex. People tend to couple up once you have more than three. So more often than not a foursome is really 2 twosomes, and a fivesome is 1 twosome and 1 threesome, and so on and etc.

But with a threesome you can really focus on each other, find lots of positions to access each other, and have a lot of fun.

A month or so ago I attended a great class on having threesomes, taught by Reid Mihalko. It covered starting a threesome, emotional considerations, and various positions. I even helped demonstrate some positions. (Unfortunately we were all clothed, but it's a fun way to meet new people.)

Reid teaches a lot of classes and has a great website you might want to check out, at reidmihalko . com.

So recently I was at a play party and discovered a new position for threesomes.

My Mistress had strapped on a cock and was offering free rides. She got warmed up having a hot guy suck her cock. I warmed up her first ridee by giving her a hand job. Actually, the warm up was a threesome as well. Her husband was sitting and she was sitting between his legs. He was holding her from behind while I stood in front of them, kissing and rubbing her.

We were at this amazing private dungeon, in the wet room. The wet room was covered floor to ceiling in tile, had several shower nozzles, a drain in the floor, and a large bench that ran the length of one side of the room.

My Mistress decided to lay down on the bench to let her friend ride her cock. But the bench was all tile, so not that comfy for laying on. I jumped on the bench, leaned my back to the wall, and suggested my Mistress to lean on me for cushion.

I thought she would lean her back against my chest, in a reclining sitting position. Instead, she lay down with her head in my lap. Which meant the back of her head was resting on my cock. It was quite pleasant to have her head resting on me like that.

But then her friend mounted my Mistress's cock and started fucking her. As she did that, all the engery she was fucking into my Mistress was riding through her body and transmitting into my cock. Wow.

I could feel each thrust and movement right on my cock. It wasn't enough to get me off, but it was enough to keep me aroused and wanting more.

Her friend looked so hot, squatting over my Mistress and riding her. She started moaning. She started sweating, she kept going.

She rode her for a while in a sitting up position and then she'd lean down and kiss my Mistress. While they were making out their heads were both in my lap, rolling around over my cock.

Again, wow. My cock was throbbing in my panties as they rolled back and forth over me. Both of them moaning and sweating and thrusting for more. And more. And more. I have no idea how many orgasms they had. From their expressions it seemed like a lot.

It seemed to go on for hours. I knew I wouldn't cum from the stimulation and I think I enjoyed knowing that as well. It was a nice denial. I was helping the two of them get off and knew I wouldn't get release. But I was also absorbing all that sexual energy, sucking it all up.

Finally my Mistress's friend had had enough and she dismounted. She needed her husband to help her as she couldn't really stand. We all lay on the bench cuddling, and recovering, for a while.

What an awesome scene. And awesome people. And an awesome postion. I'll be doing that one again!

2009-04-04T10:38:00.001-04:00

Another article I wrote is up at EdenFantasys.com. It's about using safe words in BDSM scenes.

I hope you all enjoy!

http://tinyurl.com/dd2rus

Brunch and a Blow Job

2009-04-03T21:09:00.002-04:00

My Mistress likes to cut her friends hair. Not as a kinky thing; she just likes giving make-overs (OK, maybe there is a bit of a domme thing going on there after all).

A while back a friend emailed her and suggested we come over to provide a hair cut for her and a blow job for her boyfriend. Her yummy, yummy boyfriend. He and I had played a bit before, and made out a few times, but never gone as far as a blow job.

My Mistress, my Miss, and I were really tired because we'd be at a play party the night before until 5 AM. We were supposed to arrive at 11 AM, but we were all still fast asleep at 10:30, so we called to say we'd be there about noon.

It's not easy to live the sexyfuntime lifestyle!

The night before I'd been all girlie, but I went to brunch in some cute boy clothes.

Our hostess provided a wonderful breakfast of yummy foods. After we ate my Mistress set up a chair to cut our hostesses hair, sitting so they could watch the action on the couch. My Miss sat at their feet to watch as well.

Her boyfriend and I were next to each other on the couch and finally his girlfriend said, "OK, let's go boys!"

So I sat on his lap and we started making out. He's so cute; I wanted to eat him up! Oh, and I was about t0!

We kissed and kissed and kissed. Hot, deep, passionate, boy-on-boy kisses.

I could feel him getting hard and wanting more through his pants. So I pulled them down and started rubbing his cock. Mmmmm.

Somehow my Mistress was able to concentrate on cutting hair while also watching us. She is a multitasker!

There was a brief pause while my Miss tried to find us some condoms. You'd think with five kinky people in the room we'd have been able to whip one out quicker. But we found their stash, and some flavored lube.

I got on my knees, between his legs, right where I belonged. I lubed up his cock and stroked him slowly. He was hard and throbbing. I looked up; he was smiling down at me, his twitching cock in my hand.

I slipped the condom on and leaned down to suck. His cock. In my mouth. So hard between my lips. And yet, cocks aren't hard like steel; they aren't wood. They are hard with a soft, warm, spongy, muscly, cockishness that is hard to resist.

So hard to keep from the back of my throat.

I slid my mouth down, all the way, feeling his hardness on the back of my throat. Bobbing on his cock, gagging a bit, drooling a bit. My eyes were tearing up.

God, it was so good.

I looked over at my Mistress, my Miss, and our hostess staring at us. I'm not sure which turned on more, the cock rubbing against the top of my throat, or having three hot women watching.

Eventually he leaned down and pulled me off. I sat on the couch and pulled down my pants. He lubed up my cock and knelt between my legs as he stroked me.

I leaned back and moaned as he rubbed my hardness. God it was so wonderful; throbbing between his hands.

I hadn't cum in a few days. God I was so horny. He was smiling up at me, so excited to be jerking me off. Wow.

I started begging to cum. My Mistress teased that I wouldn't be cumming today. My Miss thought it amusing and hot to have me begging in front of our friends.

It was embarrassing.

And so hot.

I'm not exactly sure how I was able to hold off while begging and being stroked, but I managed it. And then she said I could. And then I did.

Over and over and over.

Wow.

So much cum, pumping out onto my belly.

Wow.

So wonderful.

Such good friends.

Such a great brunch.

First Article Published - Male Bisexuality

2009-03-28T10:38:00.002-04:00

As you know, this kitty isn't only about having sexyfuntime. Education is also important!

And to that end, my first article has been published over at EdenFantasys.com. It's about male bisexuality. A yummy topic.

Enjoy! http://tinyurl.com/dyt5ty

Deep Throat Fucking

2009-03-18T22:56:00.002-04:00

Was at a birthday play party a few weeks ago for my boyfriend. He had party games, as one does. And one was a deep-throating contest. What would you do at a kinky birthday party?

We started with a police night-stick. I do not recommend this as it is rather wide and not easy to get down. So it was really a competition of who had the deepest mouth. Not very satisfying. I clocked in at just 4 inches. Yes, I know, it's not the size that counts, but still, I knew I could do better.

Eventually someone got out a jelly double-ended dildo and things really heated up. I was going to demand a second chance, but the winner clocked in at 9.5 inches so I didn't bother.

Later, however, several of us were still wondering and I saw a hot girl in the main play area laying on her back and really jamming it down her throat. When she finished she went and washed it off. I grabbed a fresh condom and, when she returned, said I wanted another go as well.

I pushed it down my throat with her watching close by. I hadn't deep-throated in a while, so it didn't go very far. The girl smiled and then reached out and jammed it down further. "Come on," she said, "you can do better." I leaned back and took even more, feeling it push the back of my mouth open and enter my throat.

Now, I'm a perverted kitty and I really get off on the gag reflex. As in, it feels almost like an orgasm when it gets going. So I started gagging and drooling and begging for more.

My friend smiled and obliged. She jammed it down even more. We didn't measure, but I took almost the whole thing, feeling it sliding deep into my throat.

I had to time my breathing, taking extra deep breaths in rhythm to the fucking she was giving me. She kept jamming it down, causing my whole body to start shaking as my throat gagged and drool dripped from my lips.

Finally she pulled it from my throat and allowed me to catch my breath. She reached out and rubbed the spit and drool all over my face, calling me a dirty bitch. All I could do was agree, and beg for more. "Oh, you want more?" she asked. "Yes, yes," I gasped, still out of breath.

Back down the dildo went, deep into my throat. Several people were watching; several people had to turn away.

I gagged as she called me dirty, filthy names. A friend twittered about it.

I was trembling all over, my whole body on the edge of an orgasm. Or maybe I had gone over. Maybe I was having orgasm after orgasm as she jammed it in and out of my throat. All I could do was beg for more. I really didn't know what would cause me to stop. I didn't know if I could stop.

There comes a time when you're bottoming when you wonder if you can take any more. Will one more thrust be too much? Will I be able to keep going? But at the same time you know you can't possibly stop.

With all the gagging I even threw up a little, in the back of my throat, and swallowed it back down. As disgusting as that was, I wanted more. I wanted to throw up for her. She pulled out the dildo and I told her, "I want to throw up for you."

She smiled even more and called me dirty and sick.

"You want to throw up for me?" she asked.

"Yes," I panted.

"Really? You really do?"

"God yes."

She dropped the dildo and pushed her hand into my mouth, telling me she'd make me vomit.

"Do it, do it, throw up for me," her fingers pushing deep into the back of my mouth, down into my throat, my mouth open for her.

I had to grab her to stay standing. I was shaking and drooling and gagging. I thought I might faint.

Finally I couldn't take any more and we had to stop. She just smiled.

We went to clean up; my face covered in my drool. I washed my face, seeing a bit of blood in my saliva. Well, I guess that was to be expected.

We talked about what a hot scene it had been and then parted. I went and found my Mistress and Miss. They were sitting on a couch and I fell between them and just laid there, floating. I'm so lucky to have them. They'd watched the whole thing and were more than happy to snuggle me now that it was over, and I had cleaned up.

I had so much adrenaline and other drugs floating through me (all released by my brain; nothing artificial) that I was still shaking all over. When we finally got home I could barely sleep. I don't think I came down for about 24 hours.

And now I want more . . .

Why I Don't Like Non-Fetish Parties

2009-03-01T19:54:00.001-05:00

This kitty loves to go to parties, but I'm finding that, more and more, I prefer attending fetish parties. It's not that I need to be a full-on pervert all the time (though I do enjoy that), it's just hard to be myself at a non-fetish (vanilla) party.

First off, I'm genderqueer and identify more on the female end of the gender spectrum (if there is such a thing, which I don't always believe). When I go to a fetish party I can dress up in a way that better expresses my true gender. I can wear cute skirts or a naughty or flirty dress. At a vanilla party I have to dress as a boy.

Of course I could wear girl clothes to vanilla parties. Many transsexual, transgender, and genderqueer people do that. I really admire them. I think they have a fierceness and determination that I really respect and admire, and that I lack. I mean, they still kill trans people, don't they. I've experienced enough violence so I probably err on the safe side to avoid it.

But I'm not always comfortable being a boy. Being a boy at a party brings certain expectations. You're supposed to make the first move, and behave in certain ways. And people make certain assumptions about who you are. It's harder to overcome all of that and push out who I really am when I'm dressed as a boy. It is possible, it just takes a lot more effort. I'm usually able to achieve it with people I know, like coworkers. But it's much harder with strangers in a five minute conversation.

I was at a vanilla party around Christmas that included some people I didn't know. Talking with them and interacting I felt like a bit of a phony. Like I was presenting a false view of who I am. One of my partners even commented to some of them, saying something about how they had no idea what I was really like at a fetish party. All I could do was blush and say that I'm a bit different there.

In addition, I know I'm still self-conscious about being polyamorous. I'm much more out about being genderqueer and pansexual than I am about being poly. I'm sure it's partly that my family is the least accepting of my being poly.

All parties are about flirting. But trying to explain poly at a vanilla party can be a bit difficult. Especially being the perceived male in a FFM triad, many people look at it like I "have" two women and am casting about to increase my harem. Really I just like connecting with people on an emotional and physical level. And then making out with them.

And my partners enjoy playing with others too. We all operate under the same rules.

So I feel awkward flirting at a vanilla party. I feel a bit like a creepy guy.

Most of the people at fetish parties get poly. Or they know people in similar situations. At most vanilla parties it's pretty rare to run into other poly people. So we are met either with fascination, like we are an oddity, or derision. And I'm not always sure which it is.

So, while the BDSM scene is certainly not paradise, I find it much more open and accepting than the vanilla world. A place where I can express who I really am and how I prefer to love.

Trying to do that at a vanilla party is just too difficult most of the time. And I end up hiding by the dessert table eating pie.

Crazy Cam Whoring

2009-01-10T20:41:00.004-05:00

I know what you're wondering, how can this naughty kitty make the cam whoring experience even more bizarre? Because just having 1 chat room with people yelling random stuff at me is not odd enough.

So, how to up the ante? Why, cam while playing Second Life of course!

My cam whore address is now in my profile on Second Life. I just logged in and got this message from someone I've never met (it might actually be a poem):

Hello,

I am shemale slave in sl and crossdresser in rl.

I love cam4.

I become separated between SL and cam4 but I have possession in my cam I adore dildo and fisting am of the brazil.

I am shemale very submissive send IM for my dear.

I no limits I love to be bitch and whore and slave submissive.

I seek a mistress o cruel and dominant master.

I love cage handcuff prision.

Another Amazing Pee Scene

2008-12-21T13:41:00.002-05:00

It's amazing how getting peed on affects me. It's a bit bizarre. And by bizarre I mean wonderful.

This kitty went to a play party last night at a private home. The woman has an amazing dungeon, with a suspension pit, medical scene room that looks just like a doctor's exam room, and marble wet room.

It's a great space and great people were there, but just way too many. The dungeon was hot and humid and packed. I felt a bit overwhelmed and way too overheated, in a bad way. So my mood started to fall. A lot of people were bailing and I even considered taking off. I did find an empty place to hide for a while and try and rally.

Then, as I was walking through the dungeon one of the presenters for the evening mentioned how much she loves peeing on dirty little sluts. I was like ohhhhh. Then she said that people kept telling her about this citi kittie that likes to be peed on, and who is this citi kittie? It's good to have friends!

I almost fell over before I could say that I was this citi kittie. She smiled and began to tell me how much she enjoys watching her pee hit a little slut's skin and land in his mouth.

Immediately I felt a jolt go through me. My mood changed, I was excited, turned on, focused. It was amazing to me how I went from feeling down and thinking about leaving or at least hiding in a corner to feeling so good.

She told me she'd find me later, when she needed to pee.

I spent the next few hours flirting and kissing, riding my improved mood.

Then she found me and said she had to pee. My heart started racing. We did a quick negotiation of where she would pee; really anywhere except in my mouth. Also, she wanted me to beg for her pee. She said it turned her on more for the person to beg for it. I was willing to oblige ; )

She suggested I strip and I did, in the middle of the dungeon. We went into the wet room and she stripped. She was fairly thin with small boobies and an infectious smile that lit up when she talked about peeing on me. She wore a black Hermes dress that came off quickly. God she was hot. And she was going to pee on me!

She was telling me how excited she was to pee on a naughty slut girl and how she wanted to wash me off when she was done.

I laid down on the bench and asked her to squat over me. She was smiling and calling me a naughty girl, telling me what a hard, throbbing clit I had. I had shaved before the party (of course) and she said she was excited to pee all over my smooth skin.

She was writhing and swinging her hips while I laid under her. I was shaking all over now, begging for her pee. I used to think I shook all while getting peed on because I was in a cold tub, or a cold bathroom. The dungeon, while cooler, was still very warm, and the marble bench was warm as well. No, this was my body shaking in excitement.

Then she let go and peed all over my chest and stomach. She had a landing strip and her pussy opened just a bit as her stream of yellow pee shot out. It flared about, splashing on me, and a bit on her thighs.

She called me a naughty, dirty girl and said I needed her pee to clean me. I just said yes, yes, yes. She peed and peed while I begged for me.

After, I was so hard and turned on, I had to jerk off. She watched, telling me my clit was hard and my pussy was throbbing. I told her what a naughty girl I was and rubbed her pee all over myself. I also smelled it on my fingers, strong, her fluids so close to my face. I came as she smiled down at me.

Then she showered off and showered me off.

And I was flying. Totally high. In a completely different head space than I had been earlier.

And I was just talking away. Even as I was chatting part of my brain was thinking that I was talking too much, but I couldn't stop myself. I was just blah, blah, blah. Like a little kid that gets excited and starts telling the new person all about, well, anything!

We finished showering and kissed. I thanked her probably a million times.

Back in the dungeon my Mistress, my Miss, and my boyfriend were all sitting on the floor chatting with friends. They all stared at me and I did a little happy dance. Literally dancing and wiggling in excitement. As the climax to the 1812 Overture played. Yeah, it was an odd mix for a dungeon, but strangely fitting for that moment in my life. My partners just smiled at me, understanding that this is just one of those things that really get me going.

I flew the rest of the night and had a difficult time sleeping.

Now it's about 12 hours later and I'm still flying. It's really amazing how mood-altering getting peed on is for me.

I need to do this more often!

Thoughts on Gender and Halloween

2008-12-04T07:44:00.001-05:00

Over the years my relationship with Halloween has become a lot more complicated. As a genderqueer and transgender identified person, it is an odd holiday and can be difficult.

From what I have read, and experienced, for a lot of GQ and trans people, at first Halloween is your favorite holiday. Because it's the one day a year you can dress as your preferred gender and feel safe going out.

And as you get older, it becomes your least favorite holiday. Because it's the only day of the year you can dress as your preferred gender and feel safe going out.

As I have for the last few years, I attended a BDSM/swingers/fetish play party this year. There were a number of people that appeared to be cross dressing. (And even that term is suspect. You aren't cross dressing if you are dressing as your preferred gender. So it's a difficult topic to even discuss.) But several people appeared to be bio males dressed as women. And probably for a variety of reasons.

People dress in the clothes of a different gender for a variety of reasons.

It's the clothing of their preferred gender.
It gives them an erotic thrill.
It's humiliating.
It's taboo.
It's funny.

And it's hard to know the reasons someone is dressing the way they are.

The DSM makes the distinction between cross dressers and trans people. Cross dressers are the ones who get an erotic thrill from it. But I reject this distinction.

I get an erotic thrill from putting on a corset and miniskirt. But I'm pretty sure most cisgendered women get a thrill from putting on a corset and mini skirt too. It's part of what those clothes are designed to do. Emphasize your sexuality.

But I also prefer to wear women's clothes around the house. And I don't get much of a thrill from wearing women's jeans and a woman's polo shirt.

So I think it's a lot more complicated than pop culture or the DSM will have you believe.

I find it curious that I've never discussed gender with anyone at a play party. Not that play parties are a place where deep issues get delved into, but still, you'd think it'd come up at some point.

Once someone asked me which pronouns I prefer (which was awesome, and I was unsure what to say), but that's about as close as it's come.

This is not an accusation against anyone. I find that I have no idea how to bring it up. I get totally tongue-tied. And I'm usually pretty comfortable talking about any subject. But I have yet to discuss gender with anyone at a party.

I'd like to learn more about some of the folks that seem to be cross dressing, or are GQ, or trans, or, well, I don't actually know. Because I've never talked with them.

Maybe it's because it's still all so new for me.

I've always known I had gender issues, but chose to ignore it for years. Which we all know doesn't work.

But for years the only images of trans people I saw were people who were either the butt of a joke or the victim of a crime. And often in places you wouldn't expect. I loved the movie A Mighty Wind. But Harry Shearer's character ended up being a transexual. Really? Just for a cheap joke at the end of the film. Was that even necassary? No. But it's always good for a laugh. Put a guy in a dress.

And I've avoided the serious movies about trans issues, like Boys Don't Cry. I really have no desire to see a movie where a transperson is killed. The whole idea that this is almost a sub genre sickens me. I know it serves a purpose to educate people about how awful transphobia is and that it should be stopped. But really, it's not something I want to be exposed to. I have enough fear of hatred and violence. I don't need to see it in full color on the big screen.

For that reason I love Ugly Betty. The transsexual character is not a victim and is not a joke. She's a person with a complicated story line. It may not always be the most flattering or accurate portrayal, but at least it's not just a cheap joke or a victim role.

And so it's for similar reasons I have a complicated relationship with the BDSM scene.

In the last few years I've finally started to embrace my gender and get more comfortable with who I am. And that is in large part thanks to the BDSM scene. It's one of the few places I can dress as my preferred gender and go out and feel safe.

Also, from going to play parties and conventions I've learned that there are a lot of people who are attracted to people who are gender variant. I had no idea. As I say, from only watching the mainstream media I assumed everyone hated transpeople. I don't think I've entirely internalized it, but at least I do know that a lot of people are attracted to other forms of gender expression. And that has been very liberating.

But as I say, I'm never quite sure why others are dressing the way they are at parties. Especially at Halloween, when many people dress as a different gender for a laugh or other dismissive reasons.

This year I felt it more than previous years. So I went as a cat. I dressed in leopard print, bell bottom women's pants, a leopard print bra, a lion's tail, lion-paw half-gloves, and a lion hood. So I was both gender queer and species queer : )

I might continue this for future Halloween's—dressing as a cat.

And then, in a couple years, maybe I'll have a post lamenting that no one in the mainstream culture accepts furries and how Halloween is the only time of year you can go out as your preferred anthropomorphic creature and feel safe.

What Is Citi Kittie's Gender?

2008-11-24T22:18:00.001-05:00

I've never felt like the other boys. I've always felt different from them, from as far back as I can remember. But I've never had an overwhelming feeling of having the wrong body. I read about transsexuals and how many or most felt like they had the wrong body, but their stories didn't resonate for me. And for years I thought the only options were male or female and some people were transsexuals, meaning, in my mind, that they transitioned physically from one to the other.

Because of my limited view on the topic of gender I tried to ignore it. I identified my sexuality as bisexual and let it go at that.

Then, in the last couple of years, I started learning about transgender and that transgender could mean more than just feeling like a girl in a boy's body, or vice versa. It could mean you're a boy who's a boy in a different way from most of the other boys. Or a girl but in a way that's different from most of the other girls. Or it could be a boy in a girls body, or vice versa.

So I started exploring my gender more.

Sometimes I see gender very biologically. And I think that I'm a guy because I have a penis. And just because my personality traits are different from most men in my culture doesn't detract from the fact that I'm a guy. Because I have a penis, by definition, guys also have the personality traits that I have. From this perspective, I'm a guy, just not like most of the other guys in my culture.

But other times I see it more culturally. That there are a set of traits that define male and female and I have more traits like a female than a male, so therefore, I'm female. I know I feel more at home with most women. From this perspective I feel like a girl with penis.

I know I still don't want to transition. I really salute the people who have done that. I'm not sure I could handle it. And I'm not sure I still wouldn't feel different. I think I'd be a pretty queer girl.

Then I learned about GenderQueer, which Wikipedia defines as, "a catchall term for gender identities other than man or woman. People who identify as genderqueer may think of themselves as being both a man and a woman, as being neither a man nor a woman, or as falling completely outside the gender binary."

I was like AH HA! I'm GenderQueer. I really enjoy playing with gender, gender bending, and exploring various other genders. One thing I really like about the Dark Odyssey group is that it's a safe place to not only explore my sexuality, but also my gender.

And I generally say that I'm 'out' as being GenderQueer because I see it as such an integral part of my personality. Most people who get to know me learn pretty quickly that I'm not like most other guys. And even at work, I'll make jokes or what not that let people know I'm different.

Like one of my female coworkers was trying to open a beer bottle and couldn't get it. I said, "Do you need a man to help you with that? Because I can call Alex, I think he's here today." Hee hee. It really amuses me.

And there have been times where I've been basically accepted as a woman. I worked at a Girl Scout camp and was one of just two guys on staff. The other counselors, and the campers, all accepted me as a girl. The campers even called me "she" and "her" and sometimes even "mom." I wasn't trying to present as a woman, and sometimes didn't shave and had a bit of a beard. And I know some of the campers were just used to calling everyone "she" since there were so few guys. But I know some of them say me as a woman.

So I say I'm GenderQueer and Transgender and sometimes I'll say I'm a girl with a penis. Sometimes I appropriate the term BOI, which more usually refers to a queer woman presenting more as a man. And lately I've been reading about MTFTM. A man who is really a woman, who presents more as a man. It's all really fascinating.

In my triad we sometimes joke that my Mistress is the girl with the looks, my Miss is the girl with the smarts, and I'm the girl with the penis. Obviously my Miss is beautiful, and my Mistress is very smart, but it's amusing to us and makes us feel like super heroes.

Naughty Kitty On Cam

2008-11-05T07:50:00.004-05:00

Just found a new place to cam, this kitty is now broadcasting at: http://www.cam4.com/citikittie/

It's free to watch, you don't even need to register. Just click on the cam you want to view.

I'm currently listed under Shemale, although I find the word distasteful.

Also, I don't get any money for it. I would like to find an ad-supported site where people can watch for free and I get some $ if people click on an ad. Oh well, the naughty kitty's search continues.

Triggers and Safewords: A Tale of Two Blowjobs

2008-11-02T20:14:00.000-05:00

There's a complex relationship between abuse and arousal. I think the first books I read on the subject were Nancy Friday's, where she talked about how some people who were abused will later want to play out those same roles as a way to take control of the situation. And get really turned on as well.

I'm still not so sure about my childhood, but I know I was in an emotionally abusive relationship as an adult. So it doesn't surprise me that humiliation scenes really turn me on.

The thing is, for a scene to be really hot it has to be fake. Because if it's real, then it's abuse. It's like when you go to a slasher movie. You'll feel a lot of fear. But if you know it's fake, then you can enjoy the fear. If someone pulls a real knife on you in an alley, then it's real. So you feel the fear, but it's not fun.

During camp I had two blowjob scenes that involved humiliation. I didn't negotiate before either. Which can be a bad thing. It means you aren't sure what you are getting yourself into. It means the other person doesn't know your boundaries. It means you aren't sure what the other person has in mind, or where they are coming from.

It means, you may not be sure if what is happening is fake, or real.

One of them was at the brothel, where I was hired to blow another whore. I wrote about this earlier. I went out on the lawn and begged to suck his cock. He called me names and I told him I was his naughty little girl.

He grabbed my head, shoved his cock down my throat, and called me a bitch. And a lot of other nasty words.

But a couple of times he leaned down and, in a sweet and caring voice, asked if I was doing OK. That helped me know that what was happening was fake. Which meant that I could enjoy it.

When a BDSM scene goes really well you end up in a place called sub space or top space or The Happy Place. When a scene goes bad, I end up in a place I call The Bad Place.

Things are not so good in The Bad Place. As the name might imply.

After this scene I was really flying in subspace. I was super-chatty. In fact, I couldn't shut up and had to go for a walk to calm myself down.

The second blowjob was on a different night. I'd just met the woman and we had chatted briefly in the dungeon. We were joking around and she seemed fun and a bit snarky.

We walked down to the sexorama for an orgy. At the orgy I suggested a friend suck off the woman. She did and it was pretty hot. The woman was sort of cooing to the girl who was sucking her off. She petted her head and seemed to really enjoy being blown.

It really turned me on to watch, and I really wanted to blow the woman too.

When they were done we went out on the porch and I asked if I could blow her. She sort of looked me up and down and said I could if I wanted to. So I got on my knees and started sucking her cock.

While I was working her she made a few humiliating comments. At one point she asked if I was enjoying it because it wasn't doing anything for her. She made a few other, similar comments, indicating I wasn't doing a very good job. And then she chatted with the people standing next to her on the porch, completing ignoring me and what I was doing.

And it got me wondering. Were we doing a humiliation scene? Or were her emotions genuine? Was she into it and wanted to humiliate me? Or was she trying to be deliberately mean and dismissive?

We hadn't negotiated. We hadn't discussed a safeword. So I had no way to know what was going on.

And really, I didn't need to safeword in that situation, I could have just stopped sucking her. I wasn't tied up. I wasn't physically restrained in any way. I could have stood up and walked off.

And part of me wanted to do that. But part of me wanted to get her to like it. To do a good job blowing her.

But that didn't happen. She never showed any sign that she was enjoying it. And progressively paid less attention to me, until there wasn't any connection between the two of us. Aside from my mouth on her cock. So eventually I just stopped.

After this scene I think I was in The Bad Place. I felt withdrawn and a bit ashamed of myself, though I wasn't sure why. Another feature of The Bad Place is that I am super critical of myself. Partly I was feeling like I had done something wrong. Like I shouldn't have done the scene, or I should have negotiated first.

And partly I was feeling like I was unattractive, undesirable, as in, why would she want me to suck her off? Who was I for thinking she'd want me to do that?

I went back in the sexorama and just sat by myself, listening to other people have orgasms.

I'm not saying she abused me, but I think the scene ended up being abusive. I now think that, if you are unsure if what you are doing is a scene or not, then it's not a scene.

I saw her the next day and she was chatty and pleasant to me. So I guess she didn't want to cause me harm the night before.

But I'm still unsure.

Citi Kittie Cam Recap

2008-10-27T20:38:00.008-04:00

If you weren't watching Citi Kittie Cam last week, here's what you missed.

And remember, this naughty kitty announces camming on Twitter.

(Click each image for full-size.)

Citi Kittie is Now on Twitter

2008-10-24T21:25:00.005-04:00

I am now broadcasting updates on Twitter.

Mostly, this naughty kitty will use it to announce my webcam shows, which you can view on Yahoo Messenger. I'm:

citi (dot) kittie (at) yahoo (dot) com

You can follow me on Twitter at:

http://twitter.com/citikittie

Kittie in the Citi TV is on the Air

2008-10-19T17:48:00.017-04:00

This naughty kitty is now broadcasting on Yahoo Instant Messenger Webcam. I get really excited showing off on cam to total strangers, and any friends that might want to tune in. I usually stroke while surfing the Yahoo chat rooms, seeing how many people I can get watching me. Yahoo allows up to 30 to watch at one time, and there are times I have maxed out. That is very exciting for this little kitty. I don't put on much of a show, just dress up in something naughty and enjoy myself. But people seem to like it. If you think you'd like it, feel free to friend me on Yahoo Instant Messenger. I'm citi.kittie. I'm usually on in the mornings, before work, about 7 AM to 9 AM Eastern US time. Below are some screen captures of a recent broadcast.

Slutty Kittie in the Village Voice

2008-10-17T19:24:00.007-04:00

You know that this slutty kitty likes to get around. But I never thought I'd wind up in the Village Voice!

Oh, it's very exciting for such a little kitty.

I'm in Tristan Taormino's column Pucker Up. I'm mentioned by my scene name, Pink Pet. And, since I'm tooting my own horn, I'm sure you'll recognize in the column, from my previous blogs, my servicing of Wendy, the menu I created, and Tristan's "hiring" me to service another whore.

In addition to drawing attention to myself, I mention this because I think it's awesome that she refers to me using both male and female pronouns. I feel so gender outlaw. Wow!

A Night at the Brothel, Part 2

2008-10-16T08:15:00.004-04:00

I was “working” the brothel at Dark Odyssey summer camp, dressed in a corset and tight mini skirt, fishnet thigh highs and little leather, high heel boots. After several clients, I was feeling like a very naughty girl.

And then the host of the event, Tristan, and her partner walked up and asked for a menu. They read it over together, whispering behind the card.

What did they want? Did they want to play with me? Did they know someone they were going to recommend play with me? I was almost shaking in anticipation.

Then she told my Miss, who was acting as my pimp, that she wanted to hire me. I couldn't believe it. She quickly said that she was hiring me to play with another whore and suggested we go outside where it was cooler.

Who was the other whore? I tried looking around but couldn't see who it was in the mass of people filling the brothel.

My Mistress was on the porch and she joined us as we headed outside. And that's when I saw him. The other whore. He was short and thin, and oh so hot. He had an eager, hungry look in his eyes.

We arrived on the lawn in front of the row of cabins. Our client said she wanted me to give the guy a blow job. I got on my knees, my fishnets digging into my skin. It's a great feeling, down there, feeling the bite of fabric, reminding me of my place.

The guy, I didn't even know his name, smiled down at me as he unzipped his fly and pulled out his cock. It was non-bio, long, not too thick, hard and ready. He pulled out a condom and told me to put it on.

As I unrolled the condom down his cock our client leaned in and said, “And I want some begging.” Tapping the menu she added, “It's on the menu!”

I looked up at him. “Please let me suck your cock. Oh god, please.”

“You really want it?”

“Oh yes, please. Please! I need it down my throat.”

I don't know how many people were watching as I leaned forward and licked his cock. I licked, I sucked, I begged some more, and then I slid my mouth down the shaft.

I moved one hand to his crotch, behind the base of his cock, to try and rub him and transmit feeling more directly to his clit. As I sucked I made sure I was rocking there as well. He grabbed my head and told me I was doing a good job as he rammed in further down my throat.

Opening my throat, I took his cock down further, deep throating him. I felt the familiar pain and thrill of having something so big so deep inside my body. I gagged. My eyes teared up. I pulled back and let some spit drip off my lips as I stared up at him.

“What a good bitch. Take it, take it.”

“I need your cock, I need it so bad.”

From the corner of my eyes I could see lots of people were watching. I didn't care. I did care. I wanted everyone watching, and yet it was just the two of us. On the lawn. This was where I belonged, servicing someone, getting him off.

He rammed it down my throat again and again. Jamming it into me. Grunting. Telling me I was a good whore. Then he paused, looked down with concern on his face and in a soft voice asked, “Are you OK?”

I paused and looked up. I told him I was fine, it was going great. He smiled and then jammed it back down my throat, all aggression and need once more.

Finally he started to spasm and jerk and held my head tight to his cock. He moaned and held my head still.

“Oh, that was good,” he smiled.

That's when Tristan said she wanted a snowball ending. The guy and I looked at each other. We looked at his non-bio cock. We looked back at our client. Huh?

“Fake it!” she said.

Well, the customer is always right. So back we went. He declared that he did need to cum again so I slid my mouth down his cock.

I pulled back and looked up at him. He smiled again, one hand on the base of his cock, one on the back of my head, ready to shove it into me once more.

“Am I your dirty little girl?” I asked. Just saying it made me feel weak.

His eyes lit up. “Yes! Yes you are! And now I'm that much closer to cumming!”

That did it, I was gone. I was a girl. On her knees. Sucking a guy's cock. I was his girl, his bitch, alive only to get him off.

I took it deeper. All the way down. I gagged. I drooled. I wanted as much as he could give. I wanted whatever he had, deep in my throat, deep in my body.

He looked gone too. He threw his head back. He yelled. He grunted. And then he rammed it further down.

“Aaaaah.”

He pulled his cock out of my mouth and pulled me up a bit. We kissed. I think we both looked over to our client to make sure she was pleased.

She smiled and clapped. I collapsed.

He disappeared into the crowd.

My Mistress and Miss rushed over to help me up. I asked them to take me back to the cabin. I was done. Nothing could top that.

My throat was sore, my knees hurt, my outfit was askew.

Back at the cabin, I sat on the porch with some friends and babbled on and on about what a great time I'd had. I'm sure I was a bore, but I couldn't shut up. I was still flying. Still a naughty girl that had just sucked off a hot guy. Wow.

And I still didn't know his name.

Where's Citi Kittie Now?

2008-10-08T20:36:00.006-04:00

As you know, your slutty kitty likes to get around. To naughty parties and sexy conventions and adult bookstores and coffee shops. (What? This kitty loves a creamy latte.) But did you know that Citi Kittie has been getting around the blogosphere too?

Here's one place I snuck off too. The beautiful and sexy and wonderful Sarah Sloane's blog. She quoted this frisky kittie's thoughts about what it is that makes someone sexy. A topic I think about often.

The post is called Sexy is as Sexy Does. Her post also appears over at Best Sex Bloggers.com, which, I have to say, if you aren't reading you probably should be. But if you're reading me, then you are probably quite well-read in the sex blogosphere.

A Night at the Brothel, Part 1

2008-10-06T21:29:00.003-04:00

Being a sex-worker is a long-time fantasy of mine. I actually discussed it with my high school guidance counselor. He was very rational about it and we discussed the pros and cons. The biggest con being that it is illegal. So that has certainly held me back. I have no interest in breaking the law.

So when I was asked to "work" in the brothel at Dark Odyssey Summer Camp I, actually, had a few reservations.

I love the idea of being seen as a sex object or a fetish object. That is a real turn on for me. But I like to have some sort of connection with the person. I want the person to want me for me. Or at least want my body because they get turned on by it.

For example, gang bang scenes don't do much for me. If the woman is laying there letting any cock take her, then she doesn't really care if it is me. That just leaves me cold.

But at the same time, I like creating situations that break down the barriers that keep people from connecting sexaully. At a club or even a play party, there is usually a certain amount of small talk and flirting that takes place. Oh, you know this kitty loves flirting, but I also love when that barrier is removed and you can get right to the lust.

Another reason I enjoy being seen as a sex object is that it reverses the traditional gender roles. Being male-bodied, I'm often expected to make the first move. I'm genderqueer and my sexuality is much more femme, so I often prefer to be propositioned, as opposed to making the proposition. In general this doesn't usually work out. But being a whore would allow me to take on a more receptive role, a more traditionally female role. I saw that it could help me feel more like a girl and be accepted as a girl.

At the same time, I'm not a real heavy player, so I was concerned about boundaries and safety.

The madam told me that many of the whores have dates set up ahead of time. And some of them even make up business cards.

Once she said that, I realized I could use my time in the brothel as a way to suggest play dates with people. I often have a hard time transitioning from flirting to suggesting a play date. I get shy. Or I worry I'll offend. Or that I'll be seen as creepy. Or I just overthink it.

This would be a great way to let people know I was interested in playing with them. I could give them a card and tell them to come by when I was working, if they were interested.

So I made business cards with my name on one side and an appointment card on the back. I put little stickers on them: pink hearts and flowers and cowboy boots and the like.

On Friday and Saturday I gave out a few cards and told people I'd be at the brothel. My Miss wanted to join in too, so she decided to be my pimp. That way, if someone showed up that I didn't want to play with, she could just tell them no. My Mistress was also floating around, ready to assist if there was a problem. There was also the madam and security for the brothel. I was a very safe kitty.

I also came up with a menu of activities I'd be comfortable doing with most people. Again, I'm not a real heavy player and I was worried I'd blank on things to do while working.

On the menu that night was:

Making out
Making out with fondling/groping
Mutual masturbation
Body worship
Oral pleasure
Begging
Tickling
Light spanking
Watersports

The brothel was in the sexorama, in the fucking room. The lights were low, the sheets and drapes were dark red. People were milling about, a few were already having sex when I arrived. I was dressed in a corset and tight mini skirt, fishnet thigh highs and little leather, high heel boots.

Things started slow. My booth had a sex swing. I stood there, with my hands on the swing, smiling at the customers. The room filled up with people quickly but no one was talking to me. I started to wonder what was worse, having people I'm not interested in proposition me. Or having no one proposition me.

But soon people started talking to me, and I'd hand them a menu. It allowed the customers and I to discuss what was on the menu versus someone trying to talk me into something I didn't feel comfortable doing. And the customers found it amusing and fun that I had a menu.

Finally a friend looked over my menu and said, "Let's make out."

That got me really excited. She's super hot and crazy sexy. And the fact that she just walked up and said, "Let's make out" was such a turn on.

We started kissing and then I groped her some, my fingers making their way up her skirt. It was a tight hobble skirt, but I managed to get my fingers rubbing her between her legs, over her clothing. Oh, I loved kissing her and rubbing her. She was responding nicely. I think I was doing a good job.

I really get kind of high providing service and making people happy. She seemed to really enjoy it as well.

After her it was a bit of a blur. I had a steady stream of customers for almost an hour and 45 minutes. The first woman's boyfriend showed up. He's very hot and has extremely soft skin. He's delighful to rub and kiss and touch. We made out and then I sat him in the sling and got his pants off. I sucked his cock for a while. He didn't cum, but said he really enjoyed it.

A very hot dyke stopped by and had me suck off her non-bio cock. I love deep throating and I'm very attracted to her, so that was really hot for me. And it was a huge ego-boost that she wanted to play with me.

A hot woman stopped by with a huge cock. It was so big it couldn't take a regular condom. Luckily, she brought her own. I did my best to suck her off.

Throughout the night, I really tried to emphasize the role-play aspect of being a whore. And me being a girl. While I was with this one woman and her massive cock, I kept yelling out, "Oh my god, you're so big!" The brothel was pretty quiet, so it was rather dramatic. Or at least noisey. It also got her to say things like, "Take it bitch," which I found really hot.

Another woman I flirt with at every event stopped by and we fooled around.

And a cute boy showed up for a spanking. I like spanking in the sex rooms and making out in the dungeon. It's just fun to flaunt conventions like that.

Because they were all people I knew, my pimp didn't charge a lot for me. And that was fine. The amount of money didn't really do much for me. It was fake money anyway, so the amount really didn't matter. But the idea of exchanging something for my sexual services, wow, that was hot.

So my pimp, standing there, taking money from people and then me servicing them. Gods. It was fantastic. I felt like such a naughty girl. It was a great night.

And then the host of the event and her partner walked up and asked for a menu. And that's when my night went from a 10 to an 11.

To be continued . . .

Kittie in the Citi is Now Syndicated for LiveJournal

2008-10-02T20:29:00.002-04:00

For all my LiveJournal users, you can now have Kittie in the Citi appear right on your LJ. Just click the link below and then select Add.

http://syndicated.livejournal.com/citikittie/

Enjoy!

Petting Zoo

2008-09-29T22:04:00.004-04:00

As I’ve mentioned, I can be a bit shy about asking people for play dates. I enjoy flirting, but trying to take the flirting to the next level sometimes seems so very hard. I know I usually just over think it. But still.

So that is one of the reasons that I enjoy situations that break down that barrier between just chatting and getting physical. Like when I put on slutty clothes and turn myself into a fetish object (see previous post) or when I role-play as a whore in a brothel (see future post) or when I play as a kitty (see this post).

My Mistress, my Miss, and I ran the petting zoo at this year’s Dark Odyssey Summer Camp again. I went as a pink kitty, with kitty ears, a pink striped halter-top, pink lace panties, pink knee socks, and pink Converse high tops. And a black fox tail with a white tip attached to a butt plug. Mmmmm.

This year we had a bunch of metal cages in addition to the fencing we put up to pen in the animals. The weather was fairly hot and people were slow to arrive. I thought it was going to be a bust because there were almost no people after 10 minutes.

But then lots of people started showing up, so I got down on all fours and my Miss attached a bright pink lead to my collar and led me around.

As soon as I’m a kitty my relationship to everyone changes. And their relationship to me changes. I can walk up to people and rub against them. Most people smile and lean down and pet me. I love this.

Instant touching and being touched. No small talk. No awkward silences. No wondering what the other person is thinking. Just me purring and the person smiling and petting me.

Once I’m in kitty space I notice things differently. And I react differently. Like when the doggies started coming up to me, barking. I avoided them the way a cat would, by slinking away. When that didn’t work I’d hiss and flail my claws. (Hmm, maybe I should try that in the real world when someone is bothering me.)

But mostly I got lots of pets. I went up to people I didn’t know and rubbed their legs. They fed me treats. (I know why so many house pets are overweight.) I climbed into a few laps. That was hot, rubbing my head against legs, thighs, crotches, bellies. People smiling and then commenting on what a naughty kitty I was. A few times a hand would push me away from rubbing against some body part or other, but it was always gentle. So I’d just rub and paw other parts.

I also played with some of the other kitties. One kitty was dressed so sexy, in a leather mini skirt and a little tail. I approached slowly and mewed. She mewed back so I rubbed my face against hers. She purred and mewed. I licked her skin, tasting the salt on her neck and face.

Getting excited, I climbed over the short fence to be in the pen with her. Here was someone I’d never met before, didn’t even know her name, and I was rubbing and purring and pawing her. And she was rubbing and purring and pawing me.

We licked each other, we kissed, we mewed. Then she presented her rump.

I have to say, I was a bit thrown for a moment. I asked myself, what would a kitty do? And then thought, wait, she wants to mate? Srsly?

All the mewing and licking and pawing had me quite hard, so I got behind her and jumped up, putting my front legs on her back. I humped her leather mini skirt, imagining I was doing more, my hard cock rubbing against her through the thin fabric of my lace panties.

I was so turned on. She was turned on, humping back against me. I pushed and humped, not even bothering to look around, not even aware of what anyone else was doing or saying. I leaned down and bit her neck and she purred. I think a few people commented on the naughty kitties.

After a few minutes she hissed and jumped away, running to the far corner of the pen. She lay down and began to lick her paws. I took that as my cue to go.

(I didn’t see her after the petting zoo and I don’t think I spoke with her later either. Just a moment of humping at the petting zoo, though I will try and chat her up if I see her at another event. But will it be the same, using words together?)

I pawed my way around to some of the other animals and people. I rubbed up against a really hot girl I knew. She started petting me and telling me what a pretty kitty I was. Then she noticed my tail and started pulling on it.

Oh my. She was the only one to grab my tail that day, but it was so nice. She pulled it, she pushed it, she wiggled it. I purred and rubbed against her more. She smiled and told me I was a dirty kitty, but kept playing with my tail. I put my rump in the air and mewed. It’s so wonderful being a kitty.

There were other wonderful people I snuggled. And lots of treats fed to me. But after 90 minutes I was exhausted.

I forgot my knee pads and my knees were bright red. They stayed red for over a day. They are still scabbed over as I’m writing this. I’d also forgotten sunscreen. Even though we were in the shade, I had a good burn on my shoulders. The heat was also getting to me.

And the tail. Oh that tail. The plug is a good size for me. Every time I move, it moves inside me, rubbing me. So it was kind of like being slowly fucked in the ass for 90 minutes.

And also, as much as I love attention and love being touched, 90 minutes of non-stop petting and cooing and focused attention was almost too much.

I retreated to the cabin and hid in the shower for a while. I just needed to be away from people.

But I guess that’s how real kitties are too. Sometime they run off and hide. And then, when they are ready, the come back for more.

I’m ready . . .

Cam Whoring

2008-09-28T18:45:00.022-04:00

This naughty kitty was out last night at a play party. I dressed up fairly slutty but didn't play much. Sometimes this kitty can be a bit shy about asking people to play. I don't know why. There were lots of hot people there that would have been fun to play with. Oh well, there will be other parties.
And while I can be shy about asking people to play, I'm not that shy about showing off. Here's what I wore last night:

Non-Bio Cock Gang Bang

2008-09-23T21:40:00.000-04:00

One of the events we planned at Summer Camp this year was a non-bio cock gangbang for my Mistress. She sent out invites to several women beforehand and then chatted with women about it at camp.

My Miss was there too. I really wanted to participate in some way as well. I thought it’d be fun to be a fluffer. I didn’t want to force my way into the scene if she and the other women didn’t want a kitty like me there. But my Mistress thought it was a great idea. I decided I’d just ask if anyone wanted fluffing. I figured that wouldn’t be off-putting.

Friday night my Mistress and Miss headed off. I think I was still finalizing my outfit. I spent a lot of camp making sure my outfits were just right. Cause I’m that kind of kitty.

I found them in the Sexorama in a back room of the fucking room. Even though I arrived at the agreed-upon time, it had already begun. I guess everyone was eager….

So I walked in to see my Mistress on the bed, on her knees, with a woman fucking her with a strap on. It was crazy hot. My Mistress was moaning, the woman was moaning. In addition, my Miss and two other women were watching. The two women were getting their harnesses on.

It was such a hot scene. There was my Mistress getting it on and then the rest of us alternately watching and making small talk.

I was a bit disappointed that I had arrived late because I really would have liked to have fluffed the first women. The idea of getting on my knees, looking up at her, and sliding her cock into my mouth, wow.

The first woman was about done and the second woman was getting ready to start, so I offered my fluffing services to the woman who was third in line.

I guess you should know a couple things to help you better understand my feelings about giving blowjobs. I can dislocate my jaw. It sort of pops in and out very easily. This means I can take a lot of girth.

I also sort of get off on the gag reflex. The more I gag the more turned on I get, until I have sort of a throat orgasm. The drooling and watering eyes just adds to it. So I was very excited when the third woman said yes to my offer.

Mmmmm.

I got on my knees, my fishnet thigh highs digging into my skin a bit, and slid a condom onto her cock. It was thick, it was already hard, it was silicone. And it was strapped on to a really hot woman.

I looked up at her and licked the tip. This made her smile. Oh she had sweet eyes and such a nice little smile. Then I slid it into my mouth. I took it down and started sucking in and out, in and out. I had one hand on the cock and pressed my other hand against her panties, rubbing her pussy over the fabric. As I sucked I tried to mimic the thrusting with my hand to help transmit the feelings to her clit.

I could still hear my Mistress moaning and watched as the first woman finished and the second one started. The first woman smiled as she stepped over me to get to the door and take off her harness. It was a cramped room. All the sounds and people adding to the heat.

Then the first of many guys showed up, demanding to enter the room and … look for the fuse box.

Apparently, one of the cabins had blown a fuse and most of the cabins were dark. Well, the room had fabric stapled to the walls, but we were pretty sure there was no fuse box in there.

My Miss shooed them away as I kept sucking and my Mistress kept fucking.

The second woman wore out and needed to stop. My Mistress was laying sort of flopped on her back, looking exhausted. The third woman asked if she wanted more and my Mistress sort of waved with what little energy she had left, saying, “Y-yes, yes.”

The third woman left my mouth and headed to my Mistress’ pussy.

I approached the fourth woman. She’s someone I’ve been flirting with at events for a while now but never played much with. She had her harness out and was already hard. I snuggled her a bit and then asked if I could fluff her. She agreed and I went back to my knees. Such a nice position.

My Mistress was moaning and the third woman was groaning as the fucking continued on the bed. I put on a condom and started sucking the fourth woman’s cock. Mmmm. It’s such a hot way to connect with someone. Feeling an extension of who she is deep inside my throat as I moaned and groaned on her, pushing her cock back into her body, sending the feeling back into her pussy. My eyes were watering as I took the cock deep into my throat.

“IS THERE A FUSE BOX IN HERE?” Wow is that a good way to kill a mood. But my Mistress barely noticed as my Miss once again shooed the guy away. A few more people walked by and glanced in. I kept sucking.

The fucking had been going on for about 40 minutes and the third woman looked worn out. She pulled out and my Mistress sort of looked around dazed, on another plane of existence. “Are you OK sweetie?” asked my Miss. “Y-yes,” she said. “Do you want more?” “Wah, y-yes. More, more.”

The fourth woman headed over and started fucking. Her small frame pounding into my Mistress’s body. Both of them moaning.

“IS THERE A FUSE BOX IN HERE?” Now it was one of the event organizers. No, no, no, there is no fuse box in here! My Miss politely told him so. He glanced around the room, took in the scene, and then left.

The fifth woman and her boyfriend arrived. My Miss and I greeted them and we all started snuggling and caressing as we watched my Mistress getting fucked.

The fifth woman’s boyfriend is such an adorable cutie. He and I make out almost every chance we get. And tonight was no different. I started kissing and caressing him while his girlfriend watched. She likes to watch.

The four of us kept going back and forth, watching my Mistress and the fourth woman and caressing and fondling each other.

My Mistress had now been fucking for about an hour and the fourth woman had to tag out. My Mistress could barely talk, her eyes were rolled back in her head, she couldn’t really move. When the fifth woman asked if she wanted more she raised one hand and sort of waved her in. Unable to speak, but still wanting more sex, that’s my Mistress!

So the fifth woman went to the end of the bed and started fucking my Mistress. I kept making out with the boyfriend. Oh he’s hot. He was fondling me and I was fondling him. In his pants.

But I needed more. I undid his pants and started rubbing his cock as we kissed. It was pretty hot kissing him and rubbing his cock while we both watched his girlfriend fucking my Mistress. I was ready to suck him off too, but he said he was too tired. Apparently, he’d just been using it with his girlfriend. Damn those bio cocks, they aren’t always hard! I see this as a serious limitation, but I still like them. I said I’d get him later.

It had now been about an hour and 15 minutes. The fifth girl had had enough. My Mistress probably could have taken more, but we decided she should rest. We got her some water and then helped her back to our cabin.

I think all the women commented on how much effort it takes to fuck someone. And had a bit more of an appreciation for the effort guys have to make when fucking. Granted, I think those with bio cocks get a bit more immediate feedback and enjoyment, but still, it is a lot of work!

Remember to Pee Before Breakfast

2008-09-16T21:14:00.002-04:00

Saturday morning at Dark Odyssey Summer Camp I got up late and headed down to breakfast in my pajamas. The night before I had attended 5 Minute Dating and met some lovely people. Walking up the hill returning from breakfast was one of them.

She was wearing a bathrobe and bunny ears. I walked up to her and petted her ears. I was wearing my pink leather collar with a heart shaped tag on it. It read, “whore” and “pee on me.”

She read the tag and looked at me, “Are you a whore?”

“Yes,” I said.

“Can I pee on you?”

“Yes.”

She looked at me with her blue, blue eyes and asked, “Can I pee on you now?”

My heart was already racing. “Yes.”

“Really, right now? I haven’t peed yet this morning.”

“So it’s all dark and nasty.”

”Yeah, it will be very dirty.”

It was like time had slowed down. “You can pee on me right now.”

“ Where should we do it?”

“Not out in the open?” I suggested we go up behind a nearby cabin. She liked that idea.

I think I was already in subspace. My cock has getting hard. My cock was getting hard just from her suggesting she go pee on me. I couldn’t believe any of this was happening.

We walked beside a cabin and I got undressed. She opened her robe to reveal her smoking hot body. Her beautiful breasts, her lovely skin. Wow. I lay down and she squatted over my stomach.

“I don’t know, I’ve never done this before.”

“Do you want me to beg?”

“Oh yes, I want you to beg.”

“Oh please, please, please pee on me.”

I was staring at her pussy inches above my stomach, my naked body under hers.

She started calling me names in such a loving, gentle way. The kind of domination that drives me crazy.

“You’re so dirty, aren’t you.”

”Oh yes, god, I’m such a dirty kitty.”

“I don’t think you even deserve my pee.”

“No please, please, please pee on me.”

“Where do you want it?”

“All over me, please, on my stomach, on my chest.”

She relaxed, closed her eyes, but nothing. It almost didn’t matter. I was flying, totally gone, lost somewhere.

Some people talk about how they love getting pierced and the needle will take them into subspace. For others it happens after 15 minutes of flogging. For me, just tell me you’re going to pee on me.

“I don’t know, I don’t know if I can. Are you sure you want it?”

I was staring into her eyes and then back to her pussy. I closed my eyes. “Please, please, I know I don’t deserve, but please, please pee on me.”

“It’s going to smell.”

“Oh god yes.”

She grabbed her water bottle and drank the whole thing. Then she squatted over me again and closed her eyes.

A single drop fell on my belly.

OH MY GOD.

I was almost panting.

“Look at that, look at how dirty you are.”

“I know, I know, I’m so dirty. I’m such a dirty kitty.”

I looked down, more pee. Her pee was dripping onto my belly and then stopped.

“Oh, it’s smelly. You’re so dirty.”

I was rubbing her body, up her sides, across her breasts, down her arms. I pinched her nipples and she told me to do it more. I pinched and twisted them. She moaned.

And then it happened. As I was pinching and twisting her nipples a dark yellow stream flowed down onto my stomach. She moved up a bit to my chest and it poured onto me and down my sides.

I stared at the stream, unable to look away. The only thing in the world was she and I and that stream of pee.

Fuck.

When she was done she squatted next to me. I put my fingers in her pee and brought them to my nose, smelling her pee.

“Oh, you are a dirty kitty. Look at you, covered in my pee, smelling like my pee. You should keep it on all day. You should go to the dining hall covered in my pee.’

All I could say was, “Yes, yes.”

My cock was now hard and throbbing.

“You should put some behind your ears.”

I did, dabbing it like it was perfume.

Then she noticed my belly button was full of her pee and laughed. “Oh my god, look, you have a little well of pee, your belly button is full! Do you think you could crab-walk to the dining hall and keep it in there?”

Again, all I could say was, ‘Yes, yes.’

Then I thought of something else to say. “God, I’m so horny, I have to touch my cock.”

“Are you allowed?”

“Um, yes, I am.”

I started jerking off as she watched and played with the pee on my chest. I was ready to cum almost instantly but I let it go on for a while, just living in that moment. A moment I know I’ll return to again and again.

I came and my head fell back. I just stared at the blue sky and at her blue eyes.

“Wow. That was amazing.”

She asked if I was going to breakfast like that. I said I thought I’d best go shower and she agreed.

I picked up my clothes and she put on her robe. We walked up the hill, me covered in pee and cum and pine needles all over my back.

I thanked her again and I went into my cabin. My cabin mates saw my dirty body and asked if I was OK, thinking I’d fallen. I said I was OK and ran to the shower.

I still have no idea why she was wearing bunny ears.

Dark Odyssey Summer Camp

2008-09-16T20:39:00.003-04:00

I just got back from Dark Odyssey Summer Camp. WOW. What a great time I had. My partners and I arrived Thursday (my Miss in the morning and my Mistress at dinner time). We left Monday afternoon. In between we saw a lot, heard about a lot, and did a lot.

Things were a bit slow for me on Thursday. On Friday I attended some workshops and played a bit. On Saturday I played from before breakfast right up till midnight snack. On Sunday I played a bit and went to a class and on Monday I just flirted and packed up.

And all I can say is WOW.

OK, actually, I have a lot more to say.

I think I'll be posting for quite a while about all my experiences. So, stay tuned!

Roots of Kink – Water Sports

2008-08-08T21:04:00.000-04:00

So often it is hard to know where a kink comes from. Other times you can recall the exact moment it entered your consciousness. This is about the latter.

Growing up my sister’s best friend was a redheaded girl named She lived down the street and played with my sister every day.

I liked hanging out with my sister and her best friend (no one is surprised). I really wanted Jenny to like me. But they would usually chase me away when they were together.

Well one day I was playing with Jenny without my sister around. I forget how this came about. In her backyard she had one of those geodesic dome jungle gyms. I know I was younger than 10 but can’t recall my exact age.

In any event, we were playing on the jungle gym, side by side. We were sitting with our legs over the bars and our butts pushed down. One of us probably commented that it looked like we were sitting on the toilet. This, I’m sure, would have been very silly.

Then we swung backward so we were both hanging upside-down from our knees. Jenny joked that we had now fallen through the toilet and into the sewer. Yes, I said, and all the pee and poop is falling on us. And Jenny said, yes, it’s all pouring down on us.

I was so excited to be so close to her. And so excited to be alone with her. And so excited to b talking about something so taboo. And she was talking about it too!

Jenny probably has no memory of that day. But for me, the idea of being peed on has never left me. And the excitement and the naughtiness of it all has stayed with me. All these years.

Professional Strippers at a Kinky Play Party

2008-07-30T17:31:00.000-04:00

A couple of weeks ago I attended my first bachelor/bachelorette party with professional strippers. Full disclosure: While I strive to be a Very Naughty Kitty indeed, I have never been to a strip club that features full nudity.

Full, full disclosure: I’ve been to some male strip clubs with full nudity, but not female. I know, I’m sheltered.

So I was excited that there would be two strippers at this party. It was held at a big ranch house in the suburbs. As part of the festivities, my boyfriend and I decided to do a strip tease for the crowd. I thought we’d be a good way to get the guests warmed-up for the pros.

We have a routine we’ve done at some parties and at Dark Odyssey Summer Camp one year. It starts out to Pretty Woman with my bf in drag and me dressed in a man’s suit. (Hmmm, maybe I’m in drag too…)

While the music plays, we seduce each other, flirting, and dancing, and kissing, until we finally strip off enough clothes for me to see that she is really a he! I act shocked at the sight of his penis, but he reassures me it will be OK and places my hand on his cock.

The touch of his cock is enough to convince me. The stage direction I wrote is “I touch his cock. I go gay.”

At this point the music changes to Hey Ya and I strip down to PVC hot pants and a tight nylon club shirt. We kiss for a while and then give lap dances to the audience. It’s very naughty. And sexy. And silly. The audience always seems to enjoy it.

The guests at the bachelor/bachelorette party were no exception. The pros even watched and smiled. And I love showing off.

Then we all settled in for an hour-long presentation by the pros.

I have to say I was underwhelmed.

I’m not saying my bf and I did better. But the audience was really excited and laughing and having fun when we were up there. With the pros, not so much.

I’ve been trying to put my finger on what was missing and I think it was passion. It seemed more like naked gymnastics than something sexual.

People seemed to react with thoughts of, “Oh, how does she bend like that,” more than “Oh, that’s so hot.”

Part of the problem was that they were really trying to get tips. I was prepared to tip, but they did it in a really crass way, I thought.

At one point they laid the bride and groom on the floor and said they were going to kiss and grope their way down the bride and groom’s bodies. That sounded hot. Then added that we had to lay money on the bride and groom for them to pick up as they worked their way down.

Um, we do?!?

They also did something called Cooter Shots. The had test tubes full of shots and each woman slid a tube into her pussy and then had the bride and groom grab the tube with their mouths and fuck them with the tube. The bride and groom then leaned back and drank the shot.

OK, that was kind of interesting and a bit hot to watch. Then they offered Cooter Shots to everyone else. For $5 a shot. My Mistress and I were the only ones who took them up on the offer.

Later they sat on the floor and fucked each other with a double-dildo. While making small talk with each other. Um, yeah, not hot at all.

Then they got up and, with the double-dildo still connecting them, spun around into different positions. By now it really felt like a gymnastics exhibition.

Maybe I’ve been spoiled by all the burlesque shows I’ve been to. When they call burlesque a “strip tease” I now know what they mean. It’s more of this just seemed to be about getting naked and striking poses a performance to get the audience and excited than to just show off.

Or maybe it was doomed from the start. I’m guessing that strippers would be the high point of most bachelor/bachelorette parties. But at a kinky play party it was more of a warm up to what we’d be doing to each other later.

I still want to go to a strip club with female strippers, but I’m thinking that burlesque shows will turn me on more.

Threesome with a Film Editor

2008-06-29T12:52:00.001-04:00

The summer blockbuster movie season is upon us. How does a naughty kitty like me celebrate such an event? By posting about the time I had a threesome with an editor from a major film studio, of course!

First, let me define my terms, because nothing is sexier than some well-defined terms.

By major film studio I mean it’s a studio you’ve heard of.

By editor I mean that, when the credits roll and it says Edited By his name is there.

By blockbuster I mean you’ve seen the movies he’s edited.

By threesome I mean… well actually I’ve now built this up to be way more than it was. But I don’t have many celeb stories, so this will have to do for now. (Note that all names have been changed to protect the guilty ; )

Several years back I was dating a girl name April, my former high school sweetheart. She and her mom went to visit her grandmother out in California and ran into an old friend from high school, Yitzhak. (I’m calling him Yitzhak cause I’ve always wanted to sleep with a guy named Yitzhak. What, we can all dream!)

April and Yitzhak spent some time together when she was out there and then kept up emailing and talking on the phone when she returned east. There was some chemistry there. Well, at least some lust.

The following Thanksgiving we were all planning to be back in our hometown and decided to hook up. And by hook up I mean, April and I were doing the whole swingers and polyamory thing. And Yitzhak was single, so talk of a threesome was in the air.

My parents were out of town so we had the use of their house. We went their first and turned on the heat and made sure the lights and plumbing worked. Then we drove over the Yitzhak’s to pick him up.

He was there with his whole extended family. It felt kind of weird arriving in the middle of a huge family meal to pick up a guy for a threesome. “Hi, is Yitzhak free for some sex?”

Yeah, it was all feeling very high school.

Back at my parents place we sat around drinking wine and catching up. He told us what it’s like working for a major film studio. We told him about the swingers clubs we’d been going to.

On one level it was all very comfortable. We’d all been friends back in the day and it was fun to catch up and see how far we’ve come. On another level it was weird and awkward. Would we have sex? Who would initiate? What would happen?

He’d never been to a swingers club and was intrigued but unsure.

Finally April got up and went over to where he was sitting and started making out with him. They were going at it pretty hot and heavy and I was getting turned on. Then she undid his pants and pulled out his cock.

She started sucking his cock and I wanted to join in. She was wearing a short skirt and kneeling on the floor. I knelt behind her and pulled her ass up so I could get at it.

I pulled her skirt up and pulled her panties down and started fingering and licking her pussy.

She was very wet and really getting into it. I licked her more and finger-fucked while she continued sucking Yitzhak’s cock. We continued like that for a while. I thought about sucking his cock, but was pretty sure he wouldn’t be into it.

Finally April stopped. I don’t think Yitzhak came; I think she just stopped. We straightened our clothes and had some awkward conversation and then April left to drive Yitzhak home.

I hung out watching TV waiting for April to get back, imagining all kinds of naughtiness.

She returned about an hour later and reported that they had just talked, nothing more.

Then we went to bed in my parent’s bed and, just for good measure (or because it seemed so weird), had sex in their bed. We talked about how much she wanted Yitzhak while we fucked.

So, that is the story of my threesome with a major film studio editor. Maybe I should have added that he yelled, “Cut!” when we finished.

Kittie on a Webcam

2008-06-26T21:39:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I am a very naughty kitty. I like to dress up in naughty clothes, often a bra or corset and panties. Sometimes fishnets.

Then I go on Webcam and show off. I go into chat rooms and let anyone watch. I know, it makes me feel very naughty! I guess I like the attention.

Lots of people message me. Now and then I will chat with one of them. Sometimes the chat is hot. Most of the time it’s just bizarre.

Here are a few recent ones. (All names have been changed to protect the guilty. And yes, these are the entire chats.)

AB_AB: sweety

AB_AB: i wili happy if i c ur face sweety plz?

You have been invited to view AB_AB's webcam.

ME: i don't show face

AB_AB: ok

AB_AB: what abut ass?

AB_AB: i want c ur finger inside ass

ME: just stroking

AB_AB: i will hard with ur ass

AB_AB: ass plz

AB_AB: babe

AB_AB: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

AB_AB: ass hony plzzzzzzzzzzzzz

AB_AB: show me ur budy i like it

AB_AB: plz

AB_AB: i like ur budy

ME: thank you

AB_AB: welcome

AB_AB: its so sweet

AB_AB: make me hard its

AB_AB: give me sweet show

AB_AB: up ur feet babe

AB_AB: up one foot

AB_AB: show me boobs

AB_AB has stopped viewing your webcam.

Sometimes I’m not even sure what they are talking about.

RURU: hi

RURU: oh nice sexy body

RURU: your ass plz

RURU: be doggy plz

ME: be doggy?

RURU: your ass plz

ME: what do you mean, be a doggy?

RURU has stopped viewing your webcam.

Sometimes I am pretty sure there is a language barrier.

LIKA: u r from?

LIKA: can I see ur chest

ME: i'm in USA where are you from?

LIKA: india

LIKA: whom do u like most guys / gals?

ME: i like both, girls a bit more

LIKA: did u have sex with any guy

ME: yes, i've had boyfriends

LIKA: ok

LIKA: do u like indians to have sex?

ME: never tried

LIKA: ok

LIKA: ur cock is so hard ... It might not tires off for more time

ME: what?

LIKA: what I am saying is u r masterbating from a long time with out any rest

LIKA: so ur cock is very hard

LIKA: isn't it?

LIKA has stopped viewing your webcam.

But the love is the international language.

Actually, I think this is just lust.

DANDAN: hellow

DANDAN: very good

DANDAN: your from

ME: USA

DANDAN: very beatıfull body

ME: thanks, i love showing off

DANDAN: u bodyvery body beatıfull

DANDAN: iveryvant

DANDAN: but

DANDAN: inowinoffice

DANDAN: work

DANDAN: 2 hour later

DANDAN: i amfor you all naked do

DANDAN: ok

ME: are you watching me in your office?

DANDAN: yes

DANDAN: in office alone

DANDAN: mywork friend

DANDAN: side office work

ME: are you showing me to your coworkers?

DANDAN: 2hour lateh9

DANDAN: yes

DANDAN: i show you

DANDAN: turn

ME: where are you from?

DANDAN: i can se yours body all

DANDAN: turkey

ME: lots of gay men in Turkey?

DANDAN: turkish male verylowe sex

ME: yes?

DANDAN: i can see yours back

DANDAN: turn

DANDAN: please

BUZZ!!!

ME: you have sex with men a lot?

DANDAN: no

DANDAN: but iv ery vant fuck u

BUZZ!!!

DANDAN: turn

Often I don’t need to say a word.

SEXME: tits plzzzz

SEXME: assss

BUZZ!!!

SEXME: asss plzzz

SEXME: ass

BUZZ!!!

SEXME: plzzz

SEXME: assssssss

BUZZ!!!

SEXME: ass

BUZZ!!!

SEXME: assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

SEXME has stopped viewing your webcam.

There’s a button in the chat program that lets you Buzz the other person. It’s supposed to get the other person’s attention. I find it annoying and have turned the sound off. But I still get buzzed a lot.

HONESTLY: hi babe

HONESTLY: pls show your asshole

HONESTLY: ı have cam and ı want to make cybersex with you

BUZZ!!!

HONESTLY: so sexybody

HONESTLY: pls shoe your brsts

HONESTLY: pls show your brests

BUZZ!!!

HONESTLY: talk to me

HONESTLY: pls show your nipples

HONESTLY: ı am crazy with you

HONESTLY: marry with me be my wife

HONESTLY: ı want to fuck you

HONESTLY: pls show your asshole

HONESTLY: so sexy and clear body

HONESTLY: be my woman

HONESTLY: ı want to bite your nipples then fuck your asshole hardly and deeply

HONESTLY: now ı am kissing your legs

HONESTLY has stopped viewing your webcam.

Sometimes the chat starts out good.

UNITED: oh my gawd you look soooo nice i am 56..married male

ME: what do you think of kitties like me?

UNITED: oh my gosh i think they are sooooo sexy your breasts your hard nipples your hard pee pee

Wait, did he just call my penis a, “pee-pee”? Seriously? No good can possibly come of that.

And finally, it’s amazing how many marriage proposals I receive. From all over the world. I guess it’s getting more common, but still. I mean, how well do you really know someone you’ve chatted with for 90 seconds?

SILVERDUDE: hi

SILVERDUDE has started viewing your webcam.

SILVERDUDE: u r so hot

SILVERDUDE: baby u r so sexy reaaly i adore u

SILVERDUDE: please dou have oil there

ME: oil?

SILVERDUDE: yes oil to make your body wet and shinny

SILVERDUDE: i want to marry u sexy babe

ME: marry me? really?

SILVERDUDE: yes

SILVERDUDE: i want to marry u

SILVERDUDE: and i will have sex with u every night

SILVERDUDE: u have sexy shiny legs

ME: i think it's the light

SILVERDUDE: but i adore it

SILVERDUDE: baby really u r so hot

ME: not many places where we could get married

SILVERDUDE: i wish i can undress u and lick your nipples

SILVERDUDE: yes dear i want u so badly

SILVERDUDE: tell me baby do u come to egypt

SILVERDUDE: please say yes

ME: i have never been to Egypt

SILVERDUDE: can u come

ME: i'm in USA

SILVERDUDE: yes can't u come at all

ME: i don' t think it would work out

SILVERDUDE: can i ask u something

SILVERDUDE: can u get near the cam a little so i can see everysingle inch of your SEXy body

SILVERDUDE: please

ME: sorry

SILVERDUDE: i don't want to see your face if u don't want to

SILVERDUDE: but your sexy body please

SILVERDUDE: can u

SILVERDUDE: i wish u play in my dick th way u r doing your dick now

ME: mmmmmmm

SILVERDUDE: ur a hottie

SILVERDUDE: baby

SILVERDUDE: please squeeze your boobs

SILVERDUDE: please

SILVERDUDE: i want to kiss everysingle inch of u

SILVERDUDE: baby

SILVERDUDE: i swear if u were here i would marry u

SILVERDUDE: talk to me please

SILVERDUDE: i beg u

ME: you still want to marry me? is that even allowed in Egypt??

SILVERDUDE: nope it is not allowed in egypt but i still want to marry u

ME: then i think we would get into trouble....

SILVERDUDE: is it ok in us to get amrried

SILVERDUDE: married

ME: in California

SILVERDUDE: is it ok to marry u in california

ME: i don't think i'm ready for marriage

SILVERDUDE: we can be lovers

SILVERDUDE: baby please hold your boobs

SILVERDUDE: if we met i will leave my dick with u

SILVERDUDE: u suck it as musch as u want and i will fuck u as much as u want

SILVERDUDE: baby

SILVERDUDE: i adore your ass i want to drill u now

ME: wow

SILVERDUDE: i love u i will cum all over you body

ME: I have to go

SILVERDUDE: ok sexy

Hot Wax Party

2008-06-18T22:52:00.001-04:00

A couple weeks ago we had a naughty wax play party. My Mistress and my Miss love dripping melted wax on people and having it dripped on them.

But it can make a huge mess and is kind of labor-intensive. You need a lot of candles going, you need to cover the area so you don’t make a massive mess. You don’t find it at every kinky party. In fact, several of the parties we’ve been to lately had no wax station. So we decided to do it ourselves.

It was our first kinky party. We have a small apartment, so we can’t have many people over. We decided on a girls and trans party and invited 5 people over. There was me, my Mistress, my Miss, and 5 women who are active in the local BDSM scene.

We covered all the furniture in a layer of towels and bought a bunch of the saint candles. We were lucky and found some for Jesus and Mary! Woot! Between all the towels on everything and all the candles burning it felt like a day spa.

I was dressed in a black and pink bustier, black fishnet thigh highs with a floral pattern, and a pink miniskirt. OK, the skirt was about 5 inches long and made it about half way down my bottom. It was also see-through. Very naughty. But as I say, my Mistress and my Miss like me to look cute.

I served the drinks and passed out snacks. I got my bottom smacked a few times. I felt so violated (not really).

It was a good mix of people. There were 3 tops and 4 bottoms.

My Mistress went first, covering my Miss in wax. She was on her stomach and soon was covered in white and red and green drippings.

Next went two women who laid on their backs and held hands. Each time the wax hit they would yell and squeeze each other’s hands tighter. Oh it was so cute.

In addition to the saint candles we had a paraffin wax spa going and we lit a bunch of tea lights. If you know anything about wax play you just said, “ouch” when you read that. Tea lights are very small and burn very hot. They are not really recommended for wax play.

But we had a ton of them, bought in packs of 100 from Ikea. So we put them out just to see what people would do.

Well, one of the tops started using them like shots. She’d pick up two and them dump them really fast on the two bottoms. Wow it was hot and funny. The women really screamed from that. But it was small, so it was over quick. Just like doing a shot.

One of the other tops scraped off the layer of wax. The women had shaved before they arrived, and we had oiled them up, so it came off easily. Then she started in again, making sure to get the nipples and pussies first and pointing out that their skin was even more sensitive now, after being waxed once.

The last scene was one of the tops and a bottom that she brought. Her bottom had been at the beach all day and had gotten a sunburn in random areas of her body. She didn’t apply sunscreen very well and it showed. Her top was nice and avoided the burned areas, for the most part.

After their scene was done she curled up on one of the sofas and I gave her a foot massage. She really responded to the massage, more so than the average person. So I started really giving it to her, squeezing and rubbing, and she responded in little gasps and moans. So I started rubbing my teeth over the soles of her feet and then biting her toes. I’m not sure which one of us enjoyed it more.

OK, I’m pretty sure she enjoyed it more. She was moaning and gasping. When it was over she curled up in a ball, under two towels, and fell asleep for about an hour. So yeah, she really enjoyed it.

When the party broke up the two of them decided to stay over. I drove my Miss home and when I got back my Mistress was in bed and but the two women were having sex on the pullout couch. Oh, is there anything hotter than coming home to two women have sex?

They had a plug-in vibe with them. They were prepared. It was awesome.

I was a bit unsure what proper etiquette is in this situation, so I sort of pretended to putter around in the kitchen so I could listen in. But I was exhausted and went to bed.

I woke up around 8 when I heard some odd thumping noise. I’m paranoid about my apartment, I’ve had leaks and the building flooded once. So I got up to investigate. One of the women, the top, was thumping the other woman on her ass. Oh, it was hot.

In my mind they had been having sex all night. Consumed with too much lust to even sleep. But I knew they had just woken up. Still, it was really hot.

Then my Mistress woke up and I made espresso for all of us.

All in all, a great party, but very messy. I was picking up bits of wax all week. I still see some now and then.

Even so, we hope to have another party soon.

Dressing Up For Mistress

2008-06-09T07:38:00.001-04:00

My Mistress and my Miss like to dress me up and show me off.

OK, I enjoy it too. Yes, I'm a naughty kittie.

Here is one of my outfits . . .

Little Kittie in the Big Citi

2008-05-22T18:07:00.000-04:00

First off, "city" and "kitty" were taken. Oh well, kitties can't spell anyway!

Secondly, I'm just a little kittie in the big city!

I'm the owned pet of my Mistress and my Miss. They share me because pet ownership has a lot of responsibilities. I was collared over a year ago at a ceremony during Dark Odyssey Spring Fire. A bunch of our friends were there.

But one thing I've learned in my scant few years in the BDSM scene is that everyone is different and unique. With different desires and motivations and needs. So, what kind of kittie am I?

I'm a citi kittie!

The three of us were visiting friends who have a D/s relationship. After spending a bit of time with them they seemed a bit concerned and/or confused that my owners would kiss me so much, and pet me so much, and didn't have me waiting on them hand and foot.

Finally my Miss explained that I'm not a country pet. She said that a country pet is expected to work on the farm, herd animals, protect the property, make Mojitos, or what have you. And that's fine, but I'm not a country pet, I'm a city pet.

I'm more like a little doggy you dress up in cute little outfits and parade around for everyone to see and admire. Sometimes you have the pet perform tricks. And you demand lots of kisses and lovin's.

It was pretty funny when she said it and pretty true. I'm just a little city pet. More of a show pet. Yes, I do wait on my owners. I try to give them lots of love and attention. And I often cook for them.

But I'm not the kind of pet you dress up in a maid's uniform and expect the place to be spotless three hours later.

I mean, that's a lot of work and I'm just a little kittie!

Weclome

2008-05-15T07:23:00.000-04:00

I'm a little kittie, living in the big citi, and I'm excited to start blogging about all my naughty adventures.

This will be a place to explore the intersections of sex and sexuality and orientation and gender identity.

I hope you enjoy the ride : )